Stupid Laurel Trick No. 43

Gunnora Hallakarva gunnora at bga.com
Sat Aug 24 09:33:29 PDT 1996


<snip, in response to earlier facetious posts re: harvesting prickly pear fruit>
>Dear Viking Answer Laurel.........
>
>Thank you very much for your advice.  I do have one question however.  Is it
>humane to sent poor apprentices out to try and conquer the mighty prickly
>pear.  It sounds that this pear, (it sounds so tame does it not?) might be a
>bit more than the apprentice is ready to tackle.  I think that they would not
>have the forethough nor the where with all to bring along a golf club, nor
>would they be safe handling a blow torch.  I know you meant the apprentice no
>harm, but I thought I should point this out before the SFPOLA (society for
>protection of lowly apprenti) caught wind of your plan.  
>
>Once again, your advice has proven invaluable to me........
>
>Mara   (sitting here laughing my butt off!!!!!!)
>
========================================================
Gentle Reader:

        Indeed, for SOME apprentices (say, young knights-in-training, or
even worse, pelicanlets) this would indeed be problematic.  However, since
Laurels' apprentices are trained to be able to cope with their
master/mistress immediately following Laurel Circles, when the average
Laurel is at the most dangerous, being surly, snappish, uncommunicative and
liable to bite, I think that they possess the neccessary reflexes and timing
to be able to handle this type of assignment with aplomb.  Witness, for
example, the hardy prentice who when she won a carved wooden chest at a
recent Tournee de Lyonesse and heard her Laurel shout "Laurel Tax!'" was
quick-witted enough to reply in the same way, "Apprentice Revolt!"  What
squire or protege could handle this situation so well??  I would add the
caution to most Laurels NOT to accompany one's apprentices when sending them
out with the blow torch, lest the said apprentice wind up using the blow
torch to fan the Laurel's butt with.  But this is a minor consideration!

---The Viking Answer Lady




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