peer fear was Re:Peerage stuff

dentim at dentim at
Wed Dec 18 11:39:36 PST 1996

>To: "Jeanne C. Stapleton" <jstaplet at>
>From: dentim at
>Subject: Re: peer fear was Re:Peerage stuff
>>> Greetings!
>(suck up stuff deleted)
>>This brings to mind another question:  do any of you fighters find
>>that you have an easier time striking up conversations and 
>>acquaintances with peers in the course of fighting on the field
>>or at practices than you do with other peers in the course of
>>events or meetings?
>Sure! I think the pressure is off , All I worry about is how to score a hit
on the guy, not what belt(or hat) he's wearing. It's a good way to "know"
someone. People's personalities show in the way they fight, call blows,
treat you on the field,etc.
>>I've always heard that this is the case, but I do not know from
>>personal experience, not being a fighter.
>Is'nt it the same with the A&S ?  If you enter a lot of project you're
going to meet a lot of Laurels. I just entered my first A&S display and met
a few of the judges. Talking to them about my project was a good way to
break the ice.
>>In my case (pardon me for going anecdotal all over you guys :-)),
>>I had the privilege of having one of the Big Hats for a span of time,
>>and I was constantly getting people saying to me, "Oh, isn't it
>>horrible having all the suck-ups around all the time" and saying
>>of someone, "Oh, isn't it awful how they sucked up".  Well, as a
>>rule, I thought it was hilarious.  I mentally assigned technical
>>and artistic ratings to the sucker-uppers.  
>>An unfortunate side effect of people vowing to stay away so that
>>they won't *look* like they're sucking up is that you're left with 
>>ones who genuinely *are* sucking up.  As a result, you can sometimes
>>feel kind of isolated and like your friends have deserted you.
>This past weekend I attended Stargate Yule. I had a great time, but it was
a little different event than the others I have gone to. No Heavy or light
tourny. So I walked around, looked at the A&S, listened to the *GREAT*
bardic comp. and had fun. BUT, there were more peers there than I could
shake a stick at. Since I couldnt talk to the knights about the normal
fighter stuff ("Did you see so-n-so's bout", "That was a great wrap you hit
me with" etc) I twiddled my thumbs.
>>I think the best advice is to *always* be genuine and sincere.  
>>Endeavor to be polite, civil, gentle and kind, but be yourself at 
>>your best.
>>It would take a really paranoid peer to assume that everyone speaking
>>to them was just "sucking up".
>>IMHO.  ;-)
>>Countess Berengaria de Montfort de Carcassonne, OP
>>Barony of Caerthe
>>Kingdom of the Outlands

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