A question....just for fun!! (fwd)

Richard L. Rohde talen at microtutors.com
Wed Apr 2 11:26:14 PST 1997


> 
> Question:    If the Keebler Elves and the Smurfs went to War, who 
> would win....and why!!!
> 
Actually, I'm not sure they ever COULD fight.  The Keebler Elves would only
fight in defense of their tree and the Smurfs are pacifists who only
accomplish things by shaming someone into following their liberal
philosophies.  But if they ever did fight, my money's on the Elves.  Who'd
bet on a pacifist to win a war?  I'll take the greedy capitalists any day! 
Besides, the elves' war machine would be powered by all those neat gadgets
they invent and fed by chocolate.  No woadish Smurf could stand up to that
combination.

The real question however is whether the Elves can field an effective
shield wall as the Smurfs will outnumber them greatly in the open field
battles and sieges (though I'd rather defend the tree than the mushroom
village).  Worse yet, "Smurf" in German means "Little Demon" or some such,
and this bodes ill for the Resurrection Battle!  No matter how effective
the Elves are as individual fighters, the steady stream of Smurfs from
resurrection point may prove to be too much, since time might be their
enemy as well!

As most of the Elves will still be back home defending their tree, the
Elves will have to rely heavily on their allies!  Perhaps they can enlist
the help of the Jolly Green Giant and Sprout?  What about My Little Pony? 
They'll need Cavalry as well!  Road Runner for Light Cav?  Or Taz von
Ansteorra and his Blitzkrieg war machine?  I hear it works well at Pennsic.

While on the subject, the Elves should not forget the value of training so
they can maximize their efforts.  Otherwise they'll be like the French at
Crecy and Poitiers.  Oh!  Don't forget those effective archers.  I hear
Elves are good with bows, but I think the Keebler Clan is a little short on
Long Bows :)

Just my two pfennigs worth.  After all, this is far more important than
discussing the merits of Ansteorran tactics and training <BG>.

Talen
---------
Centurion Talen Gustaf von Marienburg
Cry "Havoc!" and let slip the dogs of war!
talen at microtutors.com




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