ANST - (Fwd) Santa Viagra (the Real Part III)
jyeates at bga.com
Fri Jul 10 13:13:52 PDT 1998
the voices from the past speak to me ... not to mention the fact that i am
possessed by the tree weasels who have taken over my mind and are
forcing me to distribute this communique ...
... sorta like "the day that Elvis spoke to me from the grave" .... (709)
Subject: Santa Viagra (the Real Part III)
Date sent: Thu, 9 Jul 1998 13:43:32 -0700
Saint Viagra (the real part III)
When we last left our Blessed Grayway, she was playing Lady of the Lake
to some Lance-a-Little. He had promised to keep her in ermine but treated
her like a pean.
Scullery Grayway, our young saint-in-training, was rescued from the
fountain (Wavy-Barry goodbye) by a squire, Xerox the Redundant, of her
father, Sir Tain of Naught. This squire was out being chivalrous and good,
practicing his dazzling smile and his snap blow. He was newly red-belted
and took everything his knight said as gospel. Did that mean that he was
intolerant? Did that mean that he suppressed those who reverenced the
Virgin Mary or a half-round shield? NO. Squire Xerox was kind and gentle.
Off the field.
Actually, Xerox was composing a filk-song in praise of his knight:
"Psycho-Knig-it" (the K and the N and the G are pronounced; rhymes with
All right, for those of you who are curious about such things:
(tune of "Psycho Killers" by the Talking Heads)
reputedly by a Sir B of E. but really written by some other weirdo
I might as well face up to the charge,
I'm kinda crazy and I'm kinda large.
Can't sleep: my bed's on the eric.
Don't touch me or you'll need a cleric.
Psycho knig-it, qu'est-ce que c'est.
Fa,fa,fa,fight! Fa,fa,fa,fa,fa,fight! Better
(F) (G) ( C)
Limp, limp, limp, limp away!
You start a melee and you can't even finish it.
Your sword is swinging but no one falls down.
When I'm not fighting, my sword won't talk to me.
Hit you once, can I hit you again?
(Bm ) ( C)
Say can I look at your rattan
(Bm) ( C)
Say that's OK I need that, my man
On the Rialto I'm in a flame war
With just my lance and a bucket of gore
We are crazed and we cold
We hit marshals when they call hold
(Sorry, it really isn't my fault. I think there is this mold that grows on
wet rattan. Yeah, it was El Nino, man.)
Xerox helped Scullery out of her wet things (whilst turning his head, of
course) and into a dry T-tunic. We will leave them there for a short while
whilst I pick up the quarters thrown at me.
Tune in for more of "Santa Viagra" Episode 4 or "Don't you think we should
put some duct tape on that, Milord?" by Sir Balthazar of Endor, Dwarf
Lord, Protector of the Shrine of Santa Viagra West / the Marches /
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