ANST - Heal Thyself first

Vicki Marsh xaraxene at home.com
Mon Feb 14 16:48:29 PST 2000


Baroness Xene here,

It is my belief that the discussion of declining memberships and pay-to-play
are just a symptom of a greater problem within the Society for Creative
Anachronism. Like any group, we are bound to have some internal strife and
factionalism, but it has become the mainstay and topic of discussion in most
of the groups throughout the Known World.

I liken the SCA to a living tree with many branches.  However, when one of
the branches withers and dies, all of the tree is affected.  I have had many
friends leave the SCA because of personal disputes.  I have others that left
simply because they got involved in other things. That is OK, but most leave
when they get tired of the unhappiness and bitterness that they get wound up
in.

Bickering over paid memberships is just a side issue.  No one expects a new
person in a church to tithe or pay to belong.  Neither should we.  I will
encourage paid membership, as it supports the business side of this
organization, but I won't penalize those people who choose not to become
paid members, for whatever reason.

We are dying as a group because of internal strife, gossip-mongering, and
acting like children in a sand-lot, always fighting over who is in charge.
We should be in this group to have fun, to research, to learn, to share, and
to fight with honor and chivalry on the field of battle.  We should not be
in this group to have a small area in which to boss others around, and to
seek revenge on others for past slights, either intentional or accidental.

Grow-up, people.  Get a Clue.  If you have a problem with someone, or feel
that they are doing something wrong, talk directly to the person involved.
Don't go around trying to gather a consensus with your friends about who is
in the wrong, and who is right.  Too many groups have been torn apart by a
shark-like feeding frenzy on one of its members.

And when you do work on a problem with someone, and you have done something
wrong, admit it, apologize, call the blow, and move on.  The words "I'm
sorry" can do a lot to heal a group.  And once an apology is given, learn
from the mistakes, and move on.  Forgive others.  Forgive yourselves.

I love this group, and I am very proud to be an Ansteorran.  I have traveled
throughout the Kingdom and seen a great deal of Love and happiness.  Please
share this love and chilvary with each other.  Treat each other with honor
and honesty.  Welcome new people and encourage them to be a part of your
group.

And try to have fun.  That way, others will want to join, and have fun.
Then they will want to make the fun happen, and join.  We cannot treat the
symptom.  We must cure the wounds from within first.

Bless you all and keep you well,

Baroness Xene, OL

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