[Ansteorra] History/Enculturation/Cliquishness....

[Mahee]

Besides what Gunnora listed below, think about several things.

1. For about a year, my right arm was working at 50% at best and for a
while basically not at all. So I knew when I could not help with
something, but someone seeing could not tell that any more than 5Lbs on
my right arm caused me great pain. And I felt bad if I had to say to
someone, I am sorry, I am physically not able. Or I would help and
regret it the rest of day.

2. I have a family who I may already be helping. Wives do get upset
when you stop helping them to help someone else. Or when you get
diverted for 30 minutes helping others when you should be dealing with
your children.

3. At war, I was still recovering from surgery and had orders of what I
could do and what I could not. No one came rushing over to my camp to
help me set up...BUT, I did not ask for any and would have told them if
they had that I would get it. If I had ask, I know I would have had a
team there because I have seen my barony in action and know what fabric
they are cut from.

I know there will always be exceptions to every rule, but give people a
positive shadow of a doubt and it will make the event more fun.

your servant,
mahee
> My thoughts on this whole thread boils down to:
>
> (1) People who desperately need help should learn to ask for help and
> not
> wait like Rapunzel in the tower for someone to save them.
>
> (2) If anyone, man or woman, sees someone struggling and can help
> them, we
> should all try to do so just out of courtesy and community.
>
> (3) If someone offers unneeded/unwanted assistance, it should
> *always* be
> refused politely and graciously.  There is no need for gratuitous
> rudeness
> or political oratory in response to such an offer.
>
> (4) If someone refuses an offer of assistance, treat them as an adult
> and do
> as they wish - don't force your help upon them.
>
> ::GUNNORA::
>
> (Who purchased a little red wagon for Damaris as a Yule present to
> make some
> of the hauling, e.g. of beer kegs, easier!)
>
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> Ansteorra at ansteorra.org
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