[Ansteorra] Awards and Manners (long)

[CE Huse/Lady Maria Cabeca de Vaca]

Hola!

I think I was a bit misunderstood (and that's probably my
fault...communication is not what I'm best at).

I never expect a thank you every time...sometimes just a smile or a look of
grattitude is enough. It means that my work was appreciated. Yes, Xene you
said thank you for the food at Warlord and it really warmed my heart to see
that you enjoyed it and that it made you feel better. Anthony didn't say
thank you for the tunic, but I have seen him wear it, which means to me that
he enjoys it and appreciates it (btw, Llewylyn helped pick it out...thank
him too! <smile>) that means alot to me. Xene, you and Llewylyn are what I
consider to be among my good freinds and mentors.

You see, a thank you can come in many disguises...a smile, a look of
gratitude, a hug, a kiss on the hand (that always sends shivers up my arm!),
a piece of largesse, or just a plain old thanks.

I work at nearly every event because I love the SCA, my Kingdom, my region
and my Barony. Because I love this game we play so much, I want it to be
here still when my children are old enough to play our game on an adult
level (if this is what they desire).

I think what has really gotten to me is the just plain bad manners that I
have seen at events and on the lists and the obvious politicing (and yes,
the sucking up really gets on my nerves) and the general back-stabbing. I
have seen it happen to me and others.

Well, I always say, when you see a problem just don't gripe about it, give a
suggestion. When I see someone intentionally trying to back-stab someone
(and I don't mean talking about a problem that someone has had with
another), I tell them that's not polite or change the subject entirely.
Never have I furthered a rumor or nasty story because I know what it feels
like to be the subject of nasty stories and rumors (I was the classic class
nerd/geek in school and was the recipient of such bad behavior...I know it
hurts and stays with you for a very long time). When I see plain bad
manners, I try to let the offender know in a polite manner. Many times I
have aasked if that could have been apporached in a different manner.

I'm not saying I'm perfect myself in manners, Oh brother, I've pulled some
real boners myself. But I expect someone to tell me (constructively) when
I've messed up. Many times we just don't realize that we are being rude,
crude and socially unacceptable.

For me the SCA is a way to escape the reality of the mundane world. Here I
can relax and not worry about what bills are due when because my peronna is
well-off and I don't have to worry about what the ex-husband is doing to my
children or when he is going to harrass myself and my children next, because
in my persona he's dead from a hunting accident.

Ok...I guess I'll get off my "Ms. Manners" soapbox now.

For the love of our Kingdom,
Maria