[Ansteorra] Hamlet's Cat's Soliloquy

[RIsaac9056 at aol.com]

I just wanted to share a funny little side story with everyone!


Hamlet's Cat's Soliloquy

  To go outside, and there perchance to stay
  Or to remain within: that is the question:
  Whether 'tis better for a cat to suffer
  The cuffs and buffets of inclement weather
  That Nature rains on those who roam abroad,
  Or take a nap upon a scrap of carpet,
  And so by dozing melt the solid hours
  That clog the clock's bright gears with sullen time
  And stall the dinner bell.
  To sit, to stare Outdoors, and by a stare to seem to state
  A wish to venture forth without delay,
  Then when the portal's opened up, to stand
  As if transfixed by doubt.
  To prowl; to sleep;
  To choose not knowing when we may once more
  Our readmittance gain: aye, there's the hairball;
  For if a paw were shaped to turn a knob,
  Or work a lock or slip a window-catch,
  And going out and coming in were made
  As simple as the breaking of a bowl,
  What cat would bear the household's petty plagues,
  The cook's well-practiced kicks, the butler's broom,
  The infant's careless pokes, the tickled ears,
  The trampled tail, and all the daily shocks
  That fur is heir to, when, of his own free will,
  He might his exodus or entrance make
  With a mere mitten?
  Who would spaniels fear,
  Or strays trespassing from a neighbor's yard,
  But that the dread of our unheeded cries
  And scratches at a barricaded door
  No claw can open up, dispels our nerve
  And makes us rather bear our humans' faults
  Than run away to unguessed miseries?
  Thus caution doth make house cats of us all;
  And thus the bristling hair of resolution
  Is softened up with the pale brush of thought,
  And since our choices hinge on weighty things,
  We pause upon the threshold of decision.

  ~shakespaw

Robert I.
LD Caradoc