[Ansteorra] In defense of courtesy

[Susan]

I was catching up with this thread tonight and Christian's words struck 
through to how I seem to see this issue.  Also in keeping with the 
various mentions of scouts.  I was raised to help anyone and everyone 
that I was able to; both through scouting, my mother's training, and 
being raised around a large number of people with various disabilities.  
My gut reaction when I see someone struggling with something is to jump 
in and help; one of the harder things for me to learn, in accepting some 
of my limitations, is when I can't.

As to the basic level of courtesy that many expect/hope for/anticipate 
in the SCA, I don't know the roots of it: but for many people it is the 
breath of the dream that they are in the SCA for.  It is the romance of 
what was or could have been that in many ways separates the SCA from a 
reenactment organization.  So often it it is something small, but those 
gestures that happen at events and other SCA gatherings add a difference 
to life. 

As a contrast, I'm a person that guys open the door for all of the time, 
I also tend to get the door for anyone near me coming through.  In 
regular life, I just thank the person who opened the door and life 
continues on.  I see one of the greatest contrasts in the SCA being that 
the person performing the couresy is able to be thanked with more 
emphasis (if that makes sense).  It is part of the flirting and bi-play 
that make conversation and interactions entertaining.  It is sad, but 
there are so many people who wish to be helpful and are rejected, that 
this offers a safe environment to be able to do so and not only be 
appreciated but also to recieve praise.

Sorry for any incoherance, but I hope I've managed to express what I was 
after,
Susan the Curious


James Crouchet wrote:

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>The central question is how the SCA sees courtesy. I think we can agree
>that the Victorians only play into it to the degree to which they
>influence the SCA's ideas of courtesy. I cannot deny there is some
>effect but I think it is small. I disagree with the idea that the SCA
>has adopted those Victorian ideals wholesale. I contend that the origins
>of our ideas of courtesy owe more to the ideals of the 20th Century.
>
>I think this is the crux of our different views.
>

>I'm not sure how you came to believe that is the SCA ideal of courtesy.
>Our women are as strong and capable as they choose to be. I would be
>amused to see a man try telling Sir Britta she is weak and needs to
>shelter behind him in a battle; more to the point, it would be
>considered rude. I was happy that a young lady offered to help me the
>other day when I was trying to carry too much from the hall at Crown;
>more to the point it was clearly courtesy on her part.
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