[Ansteorra] I have a question

[Sir Lyonel]

A bunch of guys in dresses and funny hats and hose put me in what they  
said was "armor" and gave me a "sword" and told me to kill another guy  
who was also dressed in "armor." The "armor" was metal-covered knee  
and elbow pads and an over-sized coat made of inside-out carpet. It  
smelled of old feet. They also stuck a "helm" on my head. It was a big  
steel cylinder with eye slots. I felt like I was stuck in a smelly  
closet, looking out a little window. My hands were protected by hockey  
gloves covered with chunks of over-lapping rust. The sword was a five- 
foot long, duct-taped stick.

The other guy's armor looked like it actually fit him. He had a  
shorter "sword" and a big shield with fishes painted on it. I guess  
that meant he was a pisces.

One of the guys in a dress said "Lay on." The guy with the shield came  
toward me, I managed to side-step him, even though the closet I was in  
seemed to only just barely move with me.

The guy with the shield charged. I turned ten kan and brought my sword  
down hard on his helm. The guy with the shield fell down.

"Hey," said the guy with the dress, "you've done this before."

I said, "Well, I have a black belt in kendo, but this is my first time  
fighting while wearing a closet. Can someone help me out of this? I  
can no longer feel my arms."

As they were pulling the scraps of carpet off of me, a pretty lady in  
a huge dress (she could have hidden a small army of children in those  
skirts) asked, "What is your name, milord?"

My name is Dennis, but I figured that would sound like a straight-line  
for a Monty Python joke, and I'd already heard enough of those for one  
day. So I said, "Lyonel," which was the only name I could recall from  
the Morte D'Arthur that didn't sound pretentious. I couldn't very well  
say "Lancelot" with my hair all helmet-scrunched like that.

Then the pretty lady fed me. I smelled like feet for the rest of the  
day.

En Lyonel

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