[Ansteorra] I have a question
Sir Lyonel
sirlyonel at hotmail.com
Sat Jul 17 09:02:00 PDT 2010
Salut cozyns,
Though silly, my tale is true. The opponent with the fish shield no
longer plays, but his brother was founding baron for a group in
Artemisia. I don't think Ansteorran's are ever introduced to the sad
indignity of carpet armor.
The very nice lady in the Elizabethan dress turned out to be only
seventeen. I was eleven years her senior and recently divorced. A
legal pairing, perhaps, but the thought of intimacy with a teen made
me feel like a pedophile, so I ended the day alone.
En Lyonel
Dennis Grace
Investigator/Negotiator
www.MedicalBillDog.com
Twitter @MedicalBillDog
Sent from my iPhone
On Jul 17, 2010, at 5:16 AM, Sir Lyonel <sirlyonel at hotmail.com> wrote:
> A bunch of guys in dresses and funny hats and hose put me in what
> they said was "armor" and gave me a "sword" and told me to kill
> another guy who was also dressed in "armor." The "armor" was metal-
> covered knee and elbow pads and an over-sized coat made of inside-
> out carpet. It smelled of old feet. They also stuck a "helm" on my
> head. It was a big steel cylinder with eye slots. I felt like I was
> stuck in a smelly closet, looking out a little window. My hands were
> protected by hockey gloves covered with chunks of over-lapping rust.
> The sword was a five-foot long, duct-taped stick.
>
> The other guy's armor looked like it actually fit him. He had a
> shorter "sword" and a big shield with fishes painted on it. I guess
> that meant he was a pisces.
>
> One of the guys in a dress said "Lay on." The guy with the shield
> came toward me, I managed to side-step him, even though the closet I
> was in seemed to only just barely move with me.
>
> The guy with the shield charged. I turned ten kan and brought my
> sword down hard on his helm. The guy with the shield fell down.
>
> "Hey," said the guy with the dress, "you've done this before."
>
> I said, "Well, I have a black belt in kendo, but this is my first
> time fighting while wearing a closet. Can someone help me out of
> this? I can no longer feel my arms."
>
> As they were pulling the scraps of carpet off of me, a pretty lady
> in a huge dress (she could have hidden a small army of children in
> those skirts) asked, "What is your name, milord?"
>
> My name is Dennis, but I figured that would sound like a straight-
> line for a Monty Python joke, and I'd already heard enough of those
> for one day. So I said, "Lyonel," which was the only name I could
> recall from the Morte D'Arthur that didn't sound pretentious. I
> couldn't very well say "Lancelot" with my hair all helmet-scrunched
> like that.
>
> Then the pretty lady fed me. I smelled like feet for the rest of the
> day.
>
> En Lyonel
>
> Sent from my iPhone
>
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