[Ansteorra] The child-free event idea

[Bree Flowers]

>> >> I have a brilliant idea! Let's see how "not alone" you are with this
>> >> thought. Plan a no-children event. It can be like an SCA event in
>> >> every other way, hold whatever activities you like (chivalric combat,
>> >> rapier, archery, equestrian, feasting, classes) pick whatever theme
>> >> inspires you, but just have a "no minors are permitted onsite at this
>> >> event" policy. See if a group will agree to sponsor it. Then see how
>> >> many people attend and you'll have your answer.
>> >>
>> >> And no, before anyone thinks this is sarcasm, it's not. Some of us
>> >> might like to have a day free of children (ours or anyone else's).
>> >> There might be a permanent home for this on the calendar if it does
>> >> well. And if it's a complete failure, well then we know we don't have
>> >> to even discuss the idea of the entire society going child-free ever
>> >> again.
>> >
>> >
>> >
>> > Well... to really meet Cionaodh's goal of a child-free SCA, you'd have
>> > to
>> > have an event that not only didn't allow children, but didn't allow
>> > people
>> > who *have* children to attend. Or maybe you could cut the parents a
>> > little
>> > slack, and if they've got kids, then only one parent could attend, while
>> > the
>> > other one stayed home with the kids.
>> >
>> > That'd be a much more realistic portrayal of the SCA he seems to want.
>> >
>> >        -Tivar Moondragon
>>
>> Tivar,
>>
>> Please take the suggestion in the good nature in which it was
>> intended. People who *have* children would be perfectly welcome at
>> this event. There are such things as babysitters and grandparents, and
>> some of us folks with children go to other things without them
>> (movies, dinners, concerts, heck my parents used to take 1 week
>> anniversary getaways).
>
>
> Granted, but how many of those things are full-weekend events? Can *you*
> afford a babysitter from Friday evening until sometime Sunday afternoon? And
> if so, how often? Maybe you can drop the kids with the grandparents, but
> what if they're in another state (or in Houston when you want to go to
> Steppes Warlord or Namron Protectorate?)

Since you asked, the grandparents in my case are not in another state,
they are in another COUNTRY. So yeah, not an option for me either, and
I am WELL aware of it. As for whether I can afford it and how often,
it would depend how badly I wanted it. If child-free weekends were a
high-priority item for me then I would re-arrange my budget to
accommodate it, or maybe swap childcare with someone I trusted. I
wouldn't make it a priority myself, but I think it's a false
assumption to think that all parents think the way I do. After all, if
all parents had my helicopter-parent attitude there wouldn't be loose
children running around at events would there? Parents are not the
Borg, we are all individuals with different priorities and different
ways of doing things.

>> As much as I love my kids, they're not some
>> sort of growth I would need to have surgically removed, and despite
>> appearances they are not in fact attached to me at the hip.
>>
>> I don't see a problem with trying this for one event and letting
>> people vote with their feet. Someone other than me would have to step
>> up and plan it though, I'm too busy with my kids ;)
>>
>> ~Eve
>
>
> Sure, you might be able to manage this for one weekend in the year, but if
> you're going to a couple events every month? (Which we were, at one time,
> with two fairly small kids.) *That's* the point I was trying to make: that a
> kid-free SCA means you're going to lose a lot of parents along with those
> kids.
>
>
>        -Tivar Moondragon

Tivar, you're missing my point. I was simply suggesting it for one
event, not even one event per year. We see how well or how poorly
attended it is and go from there. People who support the idea of
child-free events (whether they have children or not) will attend, and
people who do not will skip it. If the attendance is great and the
event is successful then maybe there is merit to the idea and we
expand it out to an annual thing, or maybe even more than one per year
and we see where the breaking point is, how many child-free events can
the kingdom support? If on the other hand few people show up (which is
what I suspect would happen) then the debate is resolved. Where is the
harm in allowing him to perform the experiment and letting him put his
money where his mouth is? And if he doesn't plan it, well then that
solves the argument too, if you don't believe in your cause enough to
put effort into it, then why should anyone take your suggestion
seriously? At this point the onus of proof to show the existence of
these like-minded supporters to his cause is on him, so let him have
the space to come up with it or not.

Yes, I may be suggesting giving him just enough rope to hang himself
with, but what if the event is successful, would it be a bad thing if
he stumbles onto something that appeals to a particular demographic in
our members? People always tell me that fighting is the heart of the
SCA and everything NEEDS to revolve around it. And if you don't have
fighting at an event that it is DOOMED to failure. Well I've been to a
number of events with no fighting at all that were quite successful if
success can be defined as being well attended, profitable, and enjoyed
by all who attended. Does that mean I think we can take fighting out
of the SCA entirely? Of course not. But every event doesn't have to
cater to every crowd or encompass every aspect of our game. What is
wrong with holding the occasional special-interest event that caters
to a particular segment of our group? Bigger isn't always better. And
who knows, smaller, more focused events might result in greater
overall attendance. I think that's an idea worth experimenting with.

~Eve