[Bordermarch] Superfluous Rhetoric

Lathrop, Dave David.Lathrop at valero.com
Wed Sep 9 08:43:23 PDT 2009

Greetings unto Bordermarch,

I have a lime tree with four limes on it. I've been babying these four limes for the last few months. HE Elisabeth wants me to pick them, but I don't know if their ripe!
I thought it was a lemon tree, but the things never turn yellow.
Who knows how to tell if a lime is ready to be plucked from the tree?
I have also been growing my grape vine for about two years; no grapes yet. Perhaps Bordemarch's grape expert could help me with this.

My wood pile still burns with aggression. I burned the hair off one side of my leg when I attempted to roll one of the burning logs over. I should have worn long pants and work boots. My sneakers now have melted soles.
After lifting and moving all those logs around, my muscles are getting bigger.

I finally walked over to the shiny thing in my yard and made the extra effort to bend over to pick it up. It turned out to be a chromed bicycle fender; we have no bikes!
I threw it into my pile of metal scrap and was set upon by some kind of hornet that lives in metal tubing. Thank God Elisabeth didn't see my arms flailing as I ran at top speed to escape the hornets.
I suffered nary a sting, but was completely out of breath after running ten yards!
The lesson here: leave the bright shiny things alone.

For our A&S day, September 26th, I think I'll put my coal forge back together and let any who might be interested attempt to forge a knife. I'll have all the stuff you'll need, you'll just have to bring your own big brain, and your own set of muscles.
HE Elisabeth has been practicing a joke, and should be able to provide some comic relief during the day.
I was also thinking that perhaps we could bury something; I'll get back with everyone as soon as I find out if Sir Simonn will be there.

I have in my possession a small Japanese plum tree, but M'lord Termiticus's new dog has chewed all the branches off it. It looks like I planted just a straight stick in the ground! Elisabeth felt sorry for me and put a cage around my plum tree to limit the dog's access.
The cage would work just dandy, but I think the tree is dead from dog bite. Elisabeth disguised my dead plum tree by putting a bunch of potted plants all around its base; --the dog ate the pots.
We'll be providing the mystery meat for the A&S day.

Next weekend is Defender of the Fort at Raven's Fort. We'd like to get a head count of who's going. We're going.

HE Santiago

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