[Bordermarch] Prattle

[Lathrop, Dave]

Unto Lord Phocas,

The Book of Weeb states that "Empathy" is one of the fourteen virtues mankind struggles to perfect while one journeys the road called Life; 
I believe you strayed to close to the edge and fell into a ditch!

I thank you for your concern about my health but your words bring no closure to the, "being hit in the head by a huge razor sharp rock covered with infectious matter; thrown by Lord Zane" thing.

Did you say he was only trying to help when he threw a gum-ball?

Did you say he threw a gum-ball at the bushes to scare away the snakes?

Do you think an old dried out gum-ball would even penetrate the dense bushes enough to scare away any snakes that might have been there?

Since HE Elisabeth has accidently hit me in the head with gum-balls more times than I can count, I do have a benchmark as to the level 
of pain that a gum-ball head-shot produces.
The pain I felt from Lord Zane's alleged gum-ball strike crossed my eyes and almost collapsed my legs!
It made me hallucinate:
I thought I saw Lord Adolf choking on his spit while laughing at me.
I thought I saw Lord Zane produce for the very first time, a wolfish grin of ill-gotten pleasure.
I thought my Youth Archery Champion, M'Lord Carlos the Ripper, was throwing things at me.
I thought the Ladies that witnessed the assault, Countess Tessa, HE Elisabeth, Lady Colecte, and Sir Simonn, saw my pain and looked the other way.

I have had some not-so-bad, but strange dreams since the head-shot occurred; one of them was about the asymmetrical properties of a mirror, highlighted
when I stood in front of it with a left-handed cabbage!

(I have to admit that I do like the dreams.)

Now As far as Lord Zane's motives are concerned...
Ugh.. I forgot what we were talking about.

The plans will be sent today.
I'm all buttery with excitement as I think about the trial production run.
I want hear about your tangent ideas before I tell you how the plans for next year's Token Machine are coming along.

That's all I got for now except we have to get our ad into the Black Star for BAM real soon.

HE Santiago



 


-----Original Message-----
To: Barony Bordermarch
Subject: [Bordermarch] Prattle
....blah, blah, blah..... crotch...blah, blah, blah.....
Not long after Sir Simonn's spider-flicking incident Lord Zane hit me in the
head with a huge razor sharp projectile causing what I'm sure will be
horrible nightmares in the near future!
I'd also like to thank anyone who deserves it.
HE Santiago
______________________________________________
 

Now Your Excellency,  
  Being that I was there at the Amphitheater, standing out of harm's way,
did I witness this event.   As you were wondering mindlessly stomping in the
high brush to the side of the seating, I did pondered as to why you were
gyrating in arcs and curves kicking through the weeds.  It occurred to me
that you must be trying to  contribute to the work at site by flushing out
any snakes that may be in the area.  Zane, though quite, is rather sharp and
very perceptive too, for he also realized what the purpose of this manic
behavior was!   As is Zane's way to quietly help, he picked up an old sweet
gum ball and lobed it in the area that you were roosting out the snakes to
help scare way the snakes. You swerved and turned around just in time to
thwart his help with your forehead.  Now I know this must have seemed like a
razor sharp blow to your self-esteem. But I hardly think it's fair to call a
dried up old sweet gum a " a huge razor sharp projectile".   As for not
understanding Zane's motives, perhaps this will ease your mind and allow to
move on to greater things.
  Like, did you send Adolf the plans for the gate shack yet?     Our Site
Token machine is coming along nicely!  Adolf and Aaron have been a big help.
I hope to have a trial production run by the end of the week or this
weekend.    How's the plans for next year Site Token Press coming?  I've
some interesting tangents to that idea for you to ponder...... like pressing
something other than metal... 


Phocas

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