ES - For those interested in fighting...

[CraigCC at AOL.com]

Unto the Populace of Elfsea, Greetings!

I would first like to thank Viscount Galen for broaching this subject.  It is
one that scholars, athletes, coaches, senseis and philosophers have been
debating as long as there have been contests of skill and intellect.  

I desperately hope I do not sound too self-aggrandizing when I say that I have
had more than a bit of success on the fighting field.  This is truly not meant
to seem a self-promotion.  In any regards, I would like to share my viewpoint.

I, and many other senior fighters, have invested a vast amount of time, effort
and discipline in developing their individual levels of fighting prowess.
And, it logically follows that the ultimate test of these hard-won abilities
is upon the list field.  Nowhere else does can a warrior be certain that his
opponent is doing his/her utmost to best him.  I believe this holds true even
upon the melee/war field. 

This having been said, I have observed in myself, and assorted other
successful fighters, a strange and confusing syndrome.   

1.  It is a deeply rooted, primal human need to succeed.  So, logically, at
some level every  fighter wants to win his/her bout and the tournament.
2.  Beyond the primal need to conquer, every fighter on a far more
intellectual level needs to use these bouts as yardsticks for his/her
technical progression.  Personally, I have learned more useful information
about my own fighting (as well as that displayed by others on the tourney
field) in official combat, than I ever learned on the fighter practice field.
In addition, I must admit I normally cannot muster up the level of
"competetive-edginess" in practice bouts.  I estimate I only am
physically/mentally able to fight at a max of 70%  outside of tourney combat.
3.  Now comes the confusing part.  After a certain level of success has been
achieved in tournament combat, it seems to me that the successful fighter
starts having some negative feelings regarding entering the lists (BTW...all
of the fighters in which I have observed this behavior are also those I would
consider deeply honorable about most things).
First, one experiences a guilt-type feeling.  It truly feels dishonorable
enter a list in which you are the favorite.  The nagging guilt whispers in the
back of your head "Let someone else enjoy the thrill of victory, you putz!"   
Second, if the fighter is lucky/skilled enough to enjoy a streak of victories
they become somewhat old-hat.  The thrill of each individual, and the overall,
victory is greatly dampened.  I KNOW a lot of you are weeping huge tears at
this last bit (OOHH poor guy, having to win so much), but please take it in
the spirit it was intended.  It may happen to you.
Third, all of the above factors may, at times, build upon eachother and impart
to the fighter a general feeling of malaise about fighting in general.
Strangely, this also seems to happen when a fighter is not having enough
success.



In conclusion, I will admit to a certain Catch-22 in my own response to these
feelings. 
If I decide to take myself out of consideration for the list, well...it really
feels a lot like regular old fighter practice.  However, if I gear up and
fight at "tournament speed" those nagging specters of guilt nip at my honor.
In the end, I believe that this is why the most successful fighters tend to
eventually gravitate to fighting in only the large, prestigious tournaments.
It is only here that they can guilt-free unleash their considerable skill,
because the are fighting EACHOTHER.  


Thanks for listening Elfsea,


Your friend Drake
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