ES - Single Parenting WAS -- ST - Glass Beadmaking Open Studio Night
elyssa99 at swbell.net
elyssa99 at swbell.net
Sat Oct 7 08:12:58 PDT 2000
First I would like to say that when the first email on this topic was posted, I don't think it was meant to offend anyone, but
instead to ask the parents to be considerate of each other so that they may both participate in activities and at the same time
give the children the attention they need from both parents. It is very hard whether you are a single parent or a couple to
make time to do the things you enjoy, especially when you work full time, and your children are involved in activities that have
absolutely nothing to do with the SCA. I think (and I may be wrong) that the minister of children was trying to tell families
to work together so that everyone has a chance to participate. While I have seen a fighter's other half (male or female) get
stuck with watching the children and not able to attend anything else (and I have been there myself) I have also seen on many
occasions the other halves of laurels and/or pelicans not able to enjoy themselves, because their spouse was busy either
teaching, judging or working their hiny off. So don't take offense and truthfully I think the comments were aimed at two parent
families more so than one parent families. So everyone just be considerate and try to let everyone particpate and have a good
time. "Stepping down off my soapbox"
Elyssa
Mary Bader wrote:
> Lady Maria, if this is the way you go about angering people, you may anger me any day of the week. Thank you for your post.
>
> Mary Taran
>
> >From: "Christine Fink" <maria_elfsea at hotmail.com>
> >To: elfsea at ansteorra.org
> >Subject: ES - Single Parenting WAS -- ST - Glass Beadmaking Open Studio Night
> >Date: Fri, 06 Oct 2000 10:34:48 CDT
> >Reply-To: elfsea at ansteorra.org
> >
> >Buenos Dias!
> >
> >I've watched this thread for the last couple of days. As a single parent
> >myself, I must comment:
> >
> >Lord Caerell:
> >As Ameline said she meant no offense. She is right about *some* dad's not
> >getting involved. Children really look up to our lords in this kingdom. Take
> >Ryan, my son, for example. He worships the ground that the heavy and light
> >fighters walk on. Unfortunately, their mundane father does not spend any
> >time with either of them and they are both craving male attention. If you
> >watch Diane around Phelippe, you can see she just adores him because he pays
> >attention to her. Ameline just wants to see more of our lords get involved
> >with entertaining our children. Don't do arts and crafts? Teach them about
> >the martial arts. At Queen's Champion, the lord running the children's area
> >(I don't remember his name) taught the children military marches and
> >strategy...they just loved it! As far as your parenting, you are to be
> >commended! There are not too many fathers who are willing to do what you
> >have done and do it as well as you have done. I have always enjoyed the
> >company of your sons.
> >
> >To the Barony:
> >Please don't come down too hard on Lord Caerell. Being a single parent is
> >still not easy in this mundane society. Though there have been many
> >improvements in our mundane society, there are still many social stigmas and
> >labels against single parenting. I always feel that I am under a magnifying
> >glass when it comes to my parenting skills bacause I am a single parent.
> >Therefore, I always feel that I have to prove I am a good parent. I know I'm
> >not the only single parent out there who feels the same (I used to belong to
> >Parents without Partners and this was a topic we covered one night and
> >nearly everyone agreed with these statements). I don't know about Lord
> >Carell, but I joined the SCA because I wanted an activity we could do as a
> >family. The SCA has become a way for me to escape these mundane social
> >stigmas, forget my financial situtation and forget about my ex-spouse. I'm
> >not saying that being a parent with a spouse is any less difficult, just
> >that as single parents we are looked upon differently and sometimes more
> >harshly.
> >
> >I aplogize if I have angered anyone, but I it kills me to see our lords and
> >ladies angry at each other. Everyone here in our Barony has become like
> >family to me and I care very deeply for all of you.
> >
> >Maria
> >
> >
> >
> >----Original Message Follows----
> >Dear Laird Caerell,
> > I take no offence at your comment YOU are taking up your parental
> >responsibility.I am sorry you have been hurt by my comment,it is to the
> >parents who are not helping,<I'm sure they just forget>.I am making
> >reference to.In all the children's activities I have done I always see one
> >to six moms help or at least checking on their kids.In that whole time I
> >have had three fathers......three, help with their kids.This is a huge
> >difference in numbers.Kids get so much from male influences I would like to
> >see more dads helping me.Again I am so sorry if my words caused you to stop
> >coming to moot,but I feel I can not change how I feel about the lack of male
> >influence at the MOC level.My office will be up for grabs soon feel free to
> >take it up and you might see what I mean.If you would like to speak with me
> >in privet my e-mail is at the bottom.Or call me my number is in the scroll.
> >
> > >It is like saying that just because I am not a Woman I can't do a good job
> >raising my two boys, and that >is BULL!
> >
> >Caerell,
> > I think men are great with kids.That's why I want their input and
> >help.When men interact with kids they often mind better and listen better .I
> >hope you can hear the true respect I have for fathers next time I speak and
> >not take offence.
> >
> >Lady Ameline Du Bois - Ameline at generich.com
> >Elfsea Minister of Children
> >Protege to Master Richard Fairbourne
> >Ansteorra
> >
> > ----- Original Message -----
> > From: Laird Caerell MacDomnaill
> > To: elfsea at ansteorra.org
> > Sent: Thursday, October 05, 2000 1:09 AM
> > Subject: Re: ES - RE: ST - Glass Beadmaking Open Studio Night
> >
> >
> > I TAKE OFFENSE TO THESE STATEMENTS!!!!!
> >
> > As a Single Parent (FATHER) and pretty much the only prarent my two boys
> >have known, I feel it makes light of what I do every day!
> >
> > YES, IT IS VERY SEXIST!
> >
> > It is like saying that just because I am not a Woman I can't do a good
> >job raising my two boys, and that is BULL!
> >
> > Please stop using this saying, It grates on my nerves everytime I hear
> >it.
> > This is one of the reasons that I don't like Elfsea Moot as I am sure to
> >hear it from the Minister of Children.
> >
> > Yes I agree that many spouses leave the raising of children up to only
> >one of the parents, BUT it is not always the Father that is running off to
> >Fighter practice.
> >
> > It is like saying that just because I am not a Woman I can't do a good
> >job raising my two boys, and that is BULL!
> >
> > MacDomnaill
> > Single Parent of Two Teenagers
> > ----- Original Message -----
> > From: Ameline Dubois
> > To: elfsea at ansteorra.org
> > Sent: Wednesday, October 04, 2000 2:01 PM
> > Subject: Re: ES - RE: ST - Glass Beadmaking Open Studio Night
> >
> >
> > Xene said....
> > >
> > > *****WARNING**** EDITORIAL OBSERVATION OF SCA
> > > FAMILIES***************WARNING****************
> > > I have found that many fathers can find time to go to fighter
> >practice(s),
> > > but they can't always find the time to watch the children when the
> >mothers
> > > want to do something creative (Yes, I'm being sexist, and yes, I do
> > > communicate this with my own husband).
> > > **********************************************
> > >
> > > Good Luck and happy bead making.
> >
> > Fathers are parents too!!!!
> > Lady Ameline Du Bois - Ameline at generich.com
> > Elfsea Minister of Children
> > Protege to Master Richard Fairbourne
> > Ansteorra
> >
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