[Elfsea] Why people are not staying

Crystal Lewis ladygwensca at yahoo.com
Tue Jun 3 11:29:51 PDT 2008


This is why I love you Gunthar! To inspire us to look within!! And yes I know you and yours will always welcome me...

To answer your questions, I won't stand here and say it was all the officer's fault...by no means. I certainly immediately became frustrated with said person when the wearing of garb was presented not as an offer but as a demand. It was the "or else" perspective that angered me. I had no issue discussing it with my guests but they were truly not interested and I wasn't going to force them. Now this was their first time and at first they were interested in learning more and getting garb for the next time but now they've lost interest. Yes they did pay, without getting a refund I might add. 

How long were they there? About an hour, maybe two. Were they rude to the officer? No. They said nothing to her. I was the voice the entire time. Was I rude? No but my tone wasn't pleasant.

I really don't want to make a big deal out of this. I brought it up because I see bad trends happening throughout the kingdom and I wish for them to be addressed. I want us to move forward in a more positive direction, to accept everyone and, most of all, have fun.

Gwen


----- Original Message ----
From: Michael Gunter <countgunthar at hotmail.com>
To: Barony of Elfsea <elfsea at lists.ansteorra.org>
Sent: Tuesday, June 3, 2008 1:10:17 PM
Subject: Re: [Elfsea] Why people are not staying

 
 
> "your presence here is ruining our ambiance".
>Never have I been more ashamed of this society
>then at that moment; I don't care if it was a high
>persona event, it was exceptionally rude and uncalled for.
 
There are a couple of ways to look at this. One is that part
of the very few site rules states that all participants and visitors
should make an attempt to blend in. If the rude person who
came up had offered some spare tunics to throw over their
mundanes, would your friends have balked? 
Some people consider our events to be Renn-Faires where
we are there to perform for them. 
 
Of course this could have been handled much better, possibly
on both sides. The person was within her rights to ask your
friends to leave. Especially if they hadn't paid admission fees.
The event is a kind of private party with rules the attendees
need to abide with. 
 
Okay, that caveat aside, we usually welcome visitors and
explain a bit about what is going on. I took time from fighting
at Spring Faire (and losing points in doing so) to explain
fighting to a group of visitors in mundanes. We welcome
visitors who are only there for a bit because perhaps
the next time they will pay to come in and wear a tunic. 
 
"High Personna" tournaments, especially as I've seen some
done by Bryn Gwlad (I'm not saying this was one of them
since I wasn't there) have tended to be a bit stuffy and smug.
People speaking "forsoothly" when it suits them or looking
down on others not dressed as well or acting the way they
want them to. 
 
An example of "High Personna" in a good way was always
the Lions Tournaments put on by Hrabia Jan or some of the
old "Culture Camp" Elfsea Springfaires. The last Three Kings
felt much like a good High Personna event. 
 
I didn't go to Bryn Gwlad because it felt rather like one of
the stuffy High Personna type events. We had been too
busy preparing for my Laurel Ceremony, Reception, and
all the rest for Warlord to get all the things requested of
visitors to Lysts ready. It looked fun and I really applaud their
effort in putting together as close to a period event as possible.
I just didn't have the time or ability to get everything ready 
just so I could attend.
 
I don't want to defend the rude actions of the person who approached
Gwen but I also wonder how the situation occurred. How long
had her friends been there? Were they rude to the lady requesting
they cover themselves? Some events are more designed to welcome
mundanes than others. And, as stated earlier, I think the approach
could probably have been a heck of a lot more polite.
 
Gwen, you know not everyone is dismissive or impolite in our
group. You have faced some bad times and rude people, but you
also know you and your family are welcome with us at any time.
Not every event is the same and not every person is. Enjoy
the good and shake your head sadly at the bad.
 
Yers,
 
Gunthar
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