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<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2><SPAN class=345541815-06102000>Dear
Caerell,</SPAN></FONT></DIV>
<DIV><SPAN class=345541815-06102000></SPAN> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2><SPAN class=345541815-06102000>I started this
thread and I did not intend to hit a hot button. I apologize to you, as
you are a sterling exception to many of the fathers that I have seen in the 22
years I have been in the SCA.</SPAN></FONT></DIV>
<DIV><SPAN class=345541815-06102000></SPAN> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2><SPAN class=345541815-06102000>What I intended to
do on this topic was create a dialogue between parents of children.
Personally, Llywelyn is a wonderful father to both my son and his - when his
focus is on them. When I am around, his focus shifts to fighting (or
computer games, or whatever) and he assumes that I will take care of the
children. We have discussed this thoroughly and that is why I occasionally
leave town and let him be totally in charge when his son (Sam) comes to
visit. We work out who gets to do what and try very hard to share the
parenting - sometimes together, sometimes apart. It takes a lot of
communication on both parts to make it work.</SPAN></FONT></DIV>
<DIV><SPAN class=345541815-06102000></SPAN> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2><SPAN class=345541815-06102000>Parenting can also
be shared by the friends and the community that we are in. Fearghus and
Arabella's daughters have been at Children's Activities working hard at most all
of the recent events, helping Ameline with her duties. I have helped watch
other people's children when they asked for help. We do that for each
other. Darius is a wonderful father to his two girls, being the
stay-at-home spouse. Many of our children have developed friendships with
other children and adults that we hope will last for a long time, and we
encourage this so that the SCA will be fun for them as well.</SPAN></FONT></DIV>
<DIV><SPAN class=345541815-06102000></SPAN> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2><SPAN class=345541815-06102000>I, too, have been a
single parent before I met Llywelyn. My "ex" doesn't try to visit with
his son at all and has chosen not to take an active part in his life. I didn't
get to go and do a lot of fun things in the evenings. I was *the* parent,
and had no one to depend on except my friends. When Llywelyn travels
during the week, I have no one to help out at home. Even now, we
have to make hard choices to put the children first. It was a
key argument in our decision to step down from the positions of Baron and
Baroness of Elfsea. </SPAN></FONT></DIV>
<DIV><SPAN class=345541815-06102000></SPAN> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2><SPAN class=345541815-06102000>But the payoff is
worth it in the long run.</SPAN></FONT></DIV>
<DIV><SPAN class=345541815-06102000></SPAN> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2><SPAN class=345541815-06102000>Caerell, I was not
making light of what you do, nor was Ameline. Please accept my personal
apology to you.</SPAN></FONT></DIV>
<DIV><SPAN class=345541815-06102000></SPAN> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2><SPAN class=345541815-06102000>Mistress Xene
Theriane</SPAN></FONT></DIV>
<DIV><SPAN class=345541815-06102000></SPAN> </DIV>
<BLOCKQUOTE style="MARGIN-RIGHT: 0px">
<DIV align=left class=OutlookMessageHeader dir=ltr><FONT face=Tahoma
size=2>-----Original Message-----<BR><B>From:</B> owner-elfsea@ansteorra.org
[mailto:owner-elfsea@ansteorra.org]<B>On Behalf Of </B>Laird Caerell
MacDomnaill<BR><B>Sent:</B> Thursday, October 05, 2000 1:09 AM<BR><B>To:</B>
elfsea@ansteorra.org<BR><B>Subject:</B> Re: ES - RE: ST - Glass Beadmaking
Open Studio Night<BR><BR></DIV></FONT>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=4>I TAKE OFFENSE TO THESE
STATEMENTS!!!!!</FONT></DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV><FONT face=Arial size=2>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial">As a Single Parent (FATHER) and pretty much the
only prarent my two boys have known, I feel it makes light of what I do
every day! </DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial">
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial"> </DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial"><FONT size=5>YES, IT IS VERY
SEXIST!</FONT></DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial"> </DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial">It is like saying that just because I am not a
Woman I can't do a good job raising my two boys, and that is BULL! </DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial"> </DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial">Please stop using this saying, It grates on my
nerves everytime I hear it.</DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial">This is one of the reasons that I don't like
Elfsea Moot as I am sure to hear it from the Minister of Children.</DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial"> </DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial">Yes I agree that many spouses leave the raising
of children up to only one of the parents, BUT it is not always the Father
that is running off to Fighter practice. </DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial"> </DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial">Caerell MacDomnaill</DIV>
<DIV style="FONT: 10pt arial">Single Parent of Two
Teenagers</DIV></DIV></FONT></DIV></BLOCKQUOTE></BODY></HTML>