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<DIV><SPAN class=050001713-22122003><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff size=2>Can we
see them have a go at Gollum?</FONT></SPAN></DIV>
<DIV><SPAN class=050001713-22122003><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff
size=2></FONT></SPAN> </DIV>
<DIV><SPAN class=050001713-22122003><FONT face=Arial color=#0000ff
size=2>Alaric</FONT></SPAN></DIV>
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<DIV></DIV>
<DIV class=OutlookMessageHeader lang=en-us dir=ltr align=left><FONT
face=Tahoma size=2>-----Original Message-----<BR><B>From:</B>
kristid2001@yahoo.com [mailto:kristid2001@yahoo.com] <BR><B>Sent:</B>
Saturday, December 20, 2003 9:35 AM<BR><B>To:</B> Barony of
Elfsea<BR><B>Subject:</B> Re: [Elfsea] FW: Queer Eye
For...<BR><BR></FONT></DIV>
<DIV>Wow! And can you just imagine the Fab 5 walking into your typical SCA
event? Carson would fall over in a dead faint, Kyan would run screaming, Thom
would just stand there with his mouth hanging open, Ted would be take one look
at the kitchen and realize he was hopelessly outclassed, and- at the right
event- Jai would never make it off of the dance floor alive!</DIV>
<DIV>Cairistiona<BR><BR><B><I>Betsy Marshall
<betsy@softwareinnovation.com></I></B> wrote:</DIV>
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<P class=MsoNormal><FONT face=Tahoma size=2><SPAN
style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: Tahoma">-----Original
Message-----<BR><B><SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">From:</SPAN></B> Peter A.
Schorn [mailto:peterschorn@pdq.net] <BR><B><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">Sent:</SPAN></B> </SPAN></FONT><st1:date
style="BACKGROUND-POSITION: left bottom; BACKGROUND-IMAGE: url(res://ietag.dll/#34/#1001); BACKGROUND-REPEAT: repeat-x"
Month="12" Day="18" Year="2003"><FONT face=Tahoma size=2><SPAN
style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: Tahoma">Thursday, December 18,
2003</SPAN></FONT></st1:date><FONT face=Tahoma size=2><SPAN
style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: Tahoma"> </SPAN></FONT><st1:time
Hour="19" Minute="51"><FONT face=Tahoma size=2><SPAN
style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: Tahoma">7:51
PM</SPAN></FONT></st1:time><FONT face=Tahoma size=2><SPAN
style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: Tahoma"><BR><B><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">To:</SPAN></B> Betsy Marshall; Beth Ham;
christiegolden.com; Corrinne Elizabeth Drake; HiyoAG24@aol.! com; Jeff
Verona; Jeffery Hartley; Joe Wolf; Lee & Susan; Lisa Woodworth; Paul
DeLisle; Ruby; rudin; Tia; Trixie A Delisle; Troyce Wilson; Wilkerson, Glen
D; ylwrose2@juno.com<BR><B><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">Subject:</SPAN></B> Queer Eye
For...</SPAN></FONT></P>
<P class=MsoNormal><FONT face="Times New Roman" size=3><SPAN
style="FONT-SIZE: 12pt"><o:p> </o:p></SPAN></FONT></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN-BOTTOM: 12pt"><B><FONT
face="Times New Roman" size=3><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold; FONT-SIZE: 12pt">...Fox
Mulder:<BR><BR></SPAN></FONT></B>THOM: Ohhhh-kay. For the record, you can
make a coffee table out of almost anything: a door, an ottoman, old steamer
trunks. You cannot make a coffee table out of stacks of porn
videos.<BR><BR>MULDER: That's not a coffee table. It's just --
convenient.<BR><BR>TED : Guys, do NOT sit on the sofa. <I><SPAN
style="FONT-STYLE: italic">(Thom quickly begins covering the sofa in Saran
Wrap.) <BR><BR></SPAN></I>MULDER: Probably wise.
<BR><BR><st1:City><st1:place>CARSON</st1:place></st1:City>: Let's talk about
this closet. I'm not seeing anything too scary here. That's because I'm only
seeing one thing here. Tell me, Fox -- GREAT name -- what do you wear to
work?<BR><BR>MULDER: Dark suit, conservative
tie.<BR><BR><st1:City><st1:place>CARSON</st1:place></st1:City>: What do you
wear when you go out in the evenings?<BR><BR>MULDER: Like to meet
informants? Dark suit, conservative
tie.<BR><BR><st1:City><st1:place>CARSON</st1:place></st1:City>: And for a
date?<BR><BR>MULDER: Date? <BR><BR>THOM: The rest of the apartment is like
some Soviet décor gulag -- but the bedroom is fantastic! Who did this for
you? Because, let's face it, you didn't do this yourself.<BR><BR>MULDER:
Kind of a weird story, really --<BR><BR><BR><B><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">...Blair Sandburg:<BR><BR><BR></SPAN></B>KYAN:
Okay. You have chosen to wear your hair this way because --
why?<BR><BR>BLAIR: I don't know. It's always been curly. It's this or white
man's 'fro.<BR><BR><st1:City><st1:place>CARSON</st1:place></st1:City>
<I><SPAN style="FONT-STYLE: italic">(sotto voce)</SPAN></I>: And this is NOT
white man's 'fro?<BR><BR>KYAN: Don't get me wrong; I salute you for avoiding
the 'fro option. But you can't just give up. You have to say, I'm willing to
fight this. I'm READY to fight this.<BR><BR>BLAIR: I di! dn't think it was
that bad.<BR><BR>KYAN: Science makes bold leaps forward in hair-care every
day, Blair. Waxes. Spray starches. Japanese thermal straightening. We have
the technology. <BR><BR><BR><B><SPAN style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">...Captain
Jack
Sparrow:<BR><BR><BR></SPAN></B><st1:City><st1:place>CARSON</st1:place></st1:City>:
Okay, this is your normal everyday look? This isn't, like, terror
drag?<BR><BR>JACK: Oh, this old thing. <I><SPAN
style="FONT-STYLE: italic">(Holds out the sleeves of his coat, tosses his
hair.)
<BR><BR></SPAN></I><st1:City><st1:place>CARSON</st1:place></st1:City>: Well,
the good side is, you're not afraid to take chances. We can work with that.
<BR><BR>TED: Come and take a look at the bar. We've tried to provide a
little more variety, a little more finesse -- some top-brand vodka for
mixers, a nice brandy --<BR><BR>JACK: Where is the rum?<BR><BR>TED: Rum --
you know, rum's nice in a pina colada or something like that, but it's a
little downscale, and if ! you'll just consider --<BR><BR>JACK <I><SPAN
style="FONT-STYLE: italic">(pulls out musket)</SPAN></I>: We'll be putting
the rum back, mate.<BR><BR>TED: And the rum goes back.<BR><BR><BR><B><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">...Lex Luthor:<BR><BR><BR></SPAN></B>KYAN: Looks
like I'm sitting this one out.<BR><BR>THOM: The stained glass, the statues
-- I feel like I'm visiting a museum, not hanging out at a friend's house.
<BR><BR>LEX: I don't like my possessions stored away in vaults. Wealth isn't
real unless you can see it. Unless you can feel it.<BR><BR>JAI <I><SPAN
style="FONT-STYLE: italic">(stares long and hard)</SPAN></I>: Are you SURE
you belong on this show?<BR><BR>LEX:
Maybe.<BR><BR><st1:City><st1:place>CARSON</st1:place></st1:City> <I><SPAN
style="FONT-STYLE: italic">(sticks his head in from the hallway)</SPAN></I>:
This man's closet is FULL of silk shirts in soft pastels and deep
purple.<BR><BR>LEX: Okay. Maybe not.<BR><BR><BR><B><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">...Legolas Greenleaf:<BR><BR><BR></SPAN></B>KYAN:
Most guys with long hair don't put in the time to condition properly, but
you have, which is kind of the saving grace here. <BR><BR>LEGOLAS: Elves
have no split ends. Our hair is, like the rest of our bodies, perfect and
unchanging.<BR><BR>KYAN: Well, it's past time for changing, because this
look hasn't been in since -- well,
ever.<BR><BR><st1:City><st1:place>CARSON</st1:place></st1:City>: Also, when
you combine it with this outfit you've got going? The overall effect is very
Cathy Rigby as Peter Pan. Not sexy.<BR><BR>JAI <I><SPAN
style="FONT-STYLE: italic">(gestures toward the windows, which are lined
with screaming girls, all clawing at the glass)</SPAN></I>: I'm not sure
this guy has a big problem with that.<BR><BR><I><SPAN
style="FONT-STYLE: italic">LEGOLAS
smirks.<BR><BR><BR><BR></SPAN></I><B><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">...Angel:<BR><BR><BR></SPAN></B><I><SPAN
style="FONT-STYLE: italic">The FAB FIVE stare.<BR><BR><BR></SPAN><!
/I>KYAN: He uses
product.<BR><BR><st1:City><st1:place>CARSON</st1:place></st1:City>: The
jacket, the pants, the shirt -- it all works.<BR><BR>THOM: Why are you even
here?<BR><BR>ANGEL: Cordelia made me. She wants your
autographs.<BR><BR>KYAN: It's like he's the One Straight Man foretold by
prophecy.<BR><BR>ANGEL <I><SPAN
style="FONT-STYLE: italic">(grimaces)</SPAN></I>: Please, no
prophecies.<BR><BR><st1:City><st1:place>CARSON</st1:place></st1:City>: For
the first and only time, I'm going to say it -- Don't change a
thing.<BR><BR>ANGEL: Can I go now?<BR><BR><BR><B><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">... Magneto<BR><BR><BR></SPAN></B>JAI: Okay, I
feel like you're giving off really hostile vibes. What is the image you're
presenting to the world? What are you trying to communicate?<BR><BR>MAGNETO:
That humanity's time is over, and that they will soon be crushed under my
heel.<BR><BR>JAI: Negative, negative energy. You'd be a lot happier if you'd
try something just a little lighter, a littl! e more colorful. And so I
thought we'd start with your name. "Magneto" -- so harsh, and frankly, it
sounds like you're trying just a bit too hard. <BR><BR>MAGNETO: I no longer
wish to be known by my human name.<BR><BR>JAI: I get that. So I just want to
show you -- we switch two letters around, and we get something so much
brighter: "Magento." <BR><BR>MAGNETO: I'm going to have to kill you all
now.<BR><BR><st1:City><st1:place>CARSON</st1:place></st1:City>: Not before
you explain this helmet. <BR><BR><BR><B><SPAN
style="FONT-WEIGHT: bold">...Hogwarts:<BR><BR><BR></SPAN></B>KYAN: This hair
-- this is not good. When did you last wash this?<BR><BR>SNAPE: I have more
important matters to attend to than hairstyles, frivolous
fool.<BR><BR><st1:City><st1:place>CARSON</st1:place></st1:City>: Starting
with the wardrobe choices. Green is <I><SPAN
style="FONT-STYLE: italic">not</SPAN></I> your color.<BR><BR>KYAN: You're a
potions master, right? You can whip up a little Selsun Blue sometime. Try
it.<BR><BR>SNAPE <I><SPAN style="FONT-STYLE: italic">(smiles
wickedly></SPAN></I>: I did put together -- this.<BR><BR><I><SPAN
style="FONT-STYLE: italic">The Fab Five stares at the bubbling
cauldron.<BR><BR></SPAN></I>TED: That is the most disreputable Pinot Noir
I've ever seen.<BR><BR>SNAPE: It's not wine, you imbeciles! It's a
potion.<BR><BR>JAI: And that would be a potion that does --
what?<BR><BR>SNAPE: Those exposed to it develop a lifelong affinity for --
polyester.<BR><BR>THOM: Run! Run! Now! Now!<BR
style="mso-special-character: line-break"><BR
style="mso-special-character: line-break"><o:p></o:p></P></DIV>_______________________________________________<BR>Elfsea
mailing
list<BR>Elfsea@ansteorra.org<BR>http://www.ansteorra.org/mailman/listinfo/elfsea<BR></BLOCKQUOTE>
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