[Gatesedge] Anyone need a good laugh?

[ClanPrater at aol.com]

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[ Picked text/plain from multipart/alternative ]
Ray (my husband) showed this to me and I thought others might find it amusing.
If we should not put these things on the email list, please let me know for I
am new and always learning. Thanks and I hope everyone enjoys.
Christina


The Top 15 Things Overheard at Medieval Medical School



"Today class, let's open our convicted criminals to rib two."

"Don't bite it! You need to swallow it alive for it to work!"

"They should translate these obscure medical terms into something easy, like
Latin."

"It may seem like pointless superstition to you youngsters, but I haven't
washed these hands since my first delivery 37 years ago."

"What do you mean we're out of wild boar snout?!?"

"Headache? Take two spotted salamanders and call me in the morning."

"Arthur, Schmarthur. What kind of insurance dost thou have?"

"Verily, it would seem our instructor Master Bush knoweth not the name of
*any* disease!"

"Goodwoman Thurmond, to you a son is born. 'Strom' shall he be called."

"Put down that dwarf and hand me the pliers!"

"Now, remove the speculum from the fire and insert it thusly..."

"No, no, push that yellow stuff back in. That's pus from the *good* fairy!"

"Good knight, thy skill at treating boils is unsurpassed in all the kingdom!
Thou shalt be called 'Sir Lance-a-lot'."

"Come now Hypoglycies, how can too much sugar possibly be bad for you?"

and the Number 1 Thing Overheard at Medieval Medical School...

"Gesundheit! Now be sure to wipe that off his liver."