ANSTHRLD - Don't go to Meridies...

[Darin Herndon]

[OFF TOPIC HUMOR to follow]

WARNING:  The following was apparently posted a Meridian Heralds list before crossing the border to someone in my barony.  It originally had a subject line of:  KINGDOM OF MERIDIES HERALD SEASON AND BAG LIMITS

>>  1300.01   GENERAL
>>
>>   1.  Any person with a valid Meridies hunting license may harvest
>heralds.
>>
>>   2.  Taking of heralds with traps or deadfalls is permitted.  The use of
>rare
>>books as bait is prohibited.
>>
>>   3.  Killing of heralds with a vehicle is prohibited.  If accidentally
>struck,
>>remove dead herald to roadside and proceed to nearest car wash.
>>
>>   4.  It is unlawful to chase, herd, or harvest heralds from a snow
>machine,
>>helicopter, or aircraft.
>>
>>   5.  It shall be unlawful to shout "newbie", "you -still- don't have a
>>device?", or "free Cathal!" for the purpose of trapping heralds.
>>
>>   6.  It shall be unlawful to hunt heralds within 100 yards of BMW
>dealerships.
>>
>>   7.  It shall be unlawful to use sheep, young squires, $100 bills,
>bunny-fur
>>bimbos, or newbies to attract heralds.
>>
>>   8.  It shall be unlawful to hunt heralds within 200 yards of Royal
>Court,
>>Baronial Court, whorehouses, health spas, sheep ranches or used
bookstores.
>>
>>   9.  If a herald is appointed to Corporate office, it shall be a felony
>to
>>hunt, trap, or possess it.
>>
>>  10.  Stuffed or mounted heralds must have a state health department
>inspection
>>for rabies and other vermin.
>>
>>  11.  It shall be illegal for a hunter to disguise himself as a sheep,
>newbie,
>>Tuchux, bunny-fur bimbo or tavern keeper for the purpose of hunting
>heralds.
>>
>>  12.  It shall be illegal to hunt any herald in actual performance of
>their
>>duties.
>>
>>  BAG LIMITS
>>
>>   1.  Yellow Bellied Sidewinder                     2
>>   2.  Two-faced Letter Writer                       1
>>   3.  Common Back-stabber                           4
>>   4.  Small-breasted Ball Buster (Female only)      3
>>   5.  Big-mouthed Pub Gut                           2
>>   6.  Honest Herald                           EXTINCT
>>   7.  Cut-throat                                    2
>>   8.  Back-stabbing Whiner                          2
>>   9.  Brown-nosed Crown Kisser                      2
>>  10.  Absent-Minded Device Loser          $100 BOUNTY

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