[Loch-Ruadh] Fw: Letter from Santa

[Steve Rourke]

 Subject: Letter from Santa


 I have been watching you very closely to see if you have been good this
year and since you have I will be telling my elves to make some goodies for
me to leave under your tree at Christmas. I was going to bring you all gifts
from the 12 days of Christmas, but we had a little problem.

 The 12 fiddlers fiddling have all come down with VD from fiddling with the
10 ladies dancing, the 11 lords leaping have knocked up the 8 maids
a-milking, and the 9 pipers piping have been arrested for doing weird things
to the 7 swans a-swimming. The 6 geese a-laying, 4 calling birds, 3 French
hens, 2 turtle doves and the partridge in a pear tree have me up to my
sledrunners in
 bird shit.

On top of all this Mrs. Claus is going through menopause, 8 of my reindeer
are in heat, the elves have joined the gay liberation and some people who
can't read a calendar have scheduled Christmas for the 5th ofJanuary.

 Maybe next year I will be able to get my shit together and bring you the
things you want. This year I suggest you get your asses down to Walmart
before everything is gone.

Sincerely,
Santa Claus



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