[Loch-Ruadh] Telling someone that what they are doing is not period
Chris Harper
bice.pietro at charter.net
Wed Sep 13 23:50:13 PDT 2006
Very well spoken, Lord Terrence. Vivat!
Bicé
At 09:25 PM 9/13/2006 -0700, you wrote:
>Terrence, an armiger of no great rank does send greetings to her Grace
>Duchess Willow,
>
> Your Grace can add myself to her estimation of those she has helped
> with her guidance and advice in the past and I found her Graces' approach
> both appropriate and well placed in every case.
>
> Not so long past having been a beginner myself, I feel that I might
> have somewhat to add to the discussion.
>
> In the first place, I have been told by management, human resources
> personnel, teachers, and others of like experience that criticism weighs
> a good deal heavier on the ear than does compliment. For that reason it
> is a common recommendation to first give two compliments before giving
> one criticism. This keeps a person from having their self-image totally
> deflated and lets them know they are at least doing something right.
>
> Also, if approaching a new person, it might help if the person knows
> who you are and what qualifications you have, so if you have not met
> them, please introduce yourself and tell them what kind of things you
> have done. I think that some people in the society may forget that new
> people may not know which coronet is which or what award is what and may
> not know that a particular piece of advice is coming from someone who has
> studied the subject.
>
> Lastly, make sure the person knows you are not trying to ostracize
> them, instead you are trying to be their friend. Take them by the
> arm. Tell them how happy you are to have them here and
> participating. Tell them how much you enjoy working to recreate period
> and that you love seeing them doing the same.
>
> One of the things that constantly amazes me is how many extremely
> intelligent and talented people we have in this society. In any regular
> group of people these people have been the "go to" people, the people who
> are looked up to, the people with the know-how and ability. In the
> society with so many intelligent people, the group dynamics change and
> the way people deal with each other has to change by huge amounts or
> feelings get hurt. I, for one, am glad to be able to associate with such
> people.
>
> Yours,
> Terrence adte Syke
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