[Namron] Re: Newbies and other issues

[Lea]

Mi'lords and ladies,
 
As an outsider looking in, wanting so badly to be part of the family, I'm seeing things that I honestly feel help or places where slight changes would make all the difference and I am being told that won't work and to "read the books" or "jump right in."  Well, I've read the books and I've been trying to "jump right in" or at least wade in.  I've been working steadily to get my gear together and learn the rules so that I can play, but it feels like every step forward I take, somehow I lose three.  I don't wish to hurt anyone's feelings, nor am I pointing fingers, but I have volunteered to help and can't get answers as to how and when.  I've stood by patiently and courteously waiting for conversations to stop so that I can ask various "persons in charge" how I can participate, but I can't even get a look acknowleging I'm there, much less the courtesy of an audience.  I know people are standing up and reporting and I get the general idea, but how it all fits together is still something
 of a mystery.  I've bought the books and read them, I've asked questions.  I've explored options.  I read these email postings every single day hoping to get a grip on things.  I feel like a baptist in a catholic service.  I know how to pray and pray enthusiastically, but damned if I can figure out when to sit, stand or kneel.  Dear people, I have talents I could have contributed had the internal squabbles stopped long enough for the group to recognise that some people don't have extroverted natures but are still quietly valuable all the same. Yall need to quit fussing with each other like cats tied in a wet bag and treat each other with respect, remembering that every opinion has value and every member is a gift to the barony.  You don't have to all agree, but you do have to respect every individual's right to disagree.  Certainly no one is perfect, where's the fun in that, nor do we all think alike.  But if someone is making a mistake, it appears to me that at least that person is
 out there participating.  Correct the behavior but foster the enthusiasm.  I shudder to think how boring it would be to sit around a meeting nodding at each other in perfect accord.  Nor can we all be loveable rascals like Matthias or Pooky.  I don't know if it's because it's late and I'm tired or I have finally reached my level of saturation, but I find that I just don't even want to try anymore.  I truly am beginning to feel like I'm too stupid to get it.  I didn't sign on for that, I only have so much free time to spend on myself and joining the SCA was suppose to be fun.  I am giving the books that I have to Matthias to bring to populace in hopes that the barony will find them to be of some use.  To those folks who were kind enough to say hi, thanks so much.  I wish I could have made you my friends.  Matt and Chris, thanks for being my sponsers.  May God bless and keep all of Namron and Skarrgard in his hands and heart.

Fare thee well,

Enara

 

		
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