[Northkeep] (no subject)

[LucanSilverwolf at aol.com]

The problem with poking a sleeping bear with a stick is that sometimes the
bear wakes up...
    One would think that after all this time I would learn that no one sees
the world the same way I do.  I never meant that any one dealing with this
situation in any way that they have to was wrong for doing so.  If the moment
of silence would help my friends and family in the SCA, then I am for it.
    My point of view in life is often times a lot harder and more paranoid
and more defiant than most anyone that I know.  As a rule of thumb I live by
"Kick me, see how long I stay down." or " If you stick my neck in a noose,
I'll kick the horse myself." It wasn't until Friday night at about 7: 30 when
I went to visit a friend who I love like she is my sister, sitting on her
front step with her candle lit and tears in her eyes, that it had fully
dawned on me how much this had hurt everyone else.
    Being the paranoid little freak I am, Tuesday's events was something I
have been excepting since I was 6 and having nightmares of the fall of our
way life.  I have been bracing and planning for that day ever since.  Tuesday
was not that day ... it was close but, the American people have surprised me.
 Instead of panicking and rioting this country banded together in ways I
never thought I would live to see.  I guess after everything I have expected
to happen didn't, I simply forgot that others couldn't see the relief that I
do.
    Lady Talana's insightful email and others which showed wisdom and
compassion that I simply lack, have reminded me that I am in the position to
support my loved ones not push them to things they are not ready to do.  I am
sorry for any strain my carelessness has caused or in second guessing on how
is best for each individual to deal with mess.
    My dear Lady Talana, Tamberlin, and others, I will still stand defiant in
the face of this terror but not so much that I forget my first duty in life.
I am here for any who need help handling this ordeal, help not my way but
your way.  Whether you want to talk or cry or be silent I am with you as much
as I can be.
    Don't worry about catching up with me, Talana,  I'll wait... and hold out
my hand for you and everyone else.

    In Service,
        Lucan Silverwolf