[Northkeep] FW: Chaucer's Pick-Up Lines!

Betsy Marshall betsy at softwareinnovation.com
Thu May 4 02:08:43 PDT 2006

Too much fun!

-----Original Message-----
From: sca-cooks-bounces+betsy=softwareinnovation.com at ansteorra.org
[mailto:sca-cooks-bounces+betsy=softwareinnovation.com at ansteorra.org] On
Behalf Of Laura C. Minnick
Sent: Wednesday, May 03, 2006 10:39 PM
To: sca-cooks at ansteorra.org
Subject: [Sca-cooks] Chaucer's Pick-Up Lines!

Just in time for 40-Year! Pick-up lines suitable for the Medieval Congress 
at Kalamazoo, and far too fun to not import into the SCA! (Change the dorme 
roome to a pavilion, and you're in business!)

Found (along with a LOT of other fun stuffe) at:

>-Do sheriffs administere thee to those who breke the kinges peace? Bycause 
>thou lookst "fyne."
>-Yf thou were a latyn tretise ich wolde putte thee in the vernacular.
>-Ich do deuote myn diligence to studye of the anatomie of engendrure. Ich 
>haue happed vpon an abstruse passage in the werke of Constantyne the 
>Affrikan De Coitu, the which I kan nat construe. For lernynges sake and 
>the goode of wisdom, woldstow performe the acte of venus withe me so that 
>ich may interpret thys clause in propre wise?
>-Ich loved thy papere, but yt wolde looke much better yscattred across the 
>floore of myn rentede dorme roome at dawne.
>-Art thou a disastrous poll tax? Bycause I feele a risynge comynge on.
>-Nyce bootes. Wanna swyve?
>-Thou lookst so mvch lyk an aungel that the friares haue lefte the roome 
>yn terror!
>-Shulle we maken the cindreblokke to synge?
>-Woldstow haue me shyfte thyne voweles?
>-Were thou yn my seisin, ich wolde nevir escheat on thee.
>-Thy beaute ys more intoxicatyng than the OVP openne bar.
>-Yf thy beautee were an poeme, yt wolde make Dante looke lyk Marcabru.
>-The preeste telleth me that we aren more than VII degrees of 
>consanguinitee. Game on!
>-Ich notyce that myn demense and thyn do abutte. Wolde yt plese thee to 
>consolidate ovre powere-base in the midlands?
>-Makstow a pilgrymage heere often?
>-Let vs breake oure mornyng faste togedir tomorrowe. Shal ich sende a page 
>wyth a message for thee, or shal ich wake thee wyth an aubade composid ex 
>-Ich coude drynke a yearlye tun of thee.
>-Ys thy father a makere of walles? For how else dide he gyve thee svch a 
>tall and fayre forheed?
>-Ich haue the tale of Lancelot yn myn roome. Woldstow rede of yt wyth me?
>--By my soule, thou art a verye mappe of helle. For thy face lyk the 
>rivere Styx wil make me swere oothes neuer to be fforsworn, and thy 
>embrace lyk the Lethe shal make me foryet al else, and lyk vnto the 
>Flegeton thyn arse ys ON FYRE!
>-Woldstow be myn Gaveston?
>-Howe abovte a blancmange and the acte of Venus? Whatte, blancmange 
>pleseth thee nat?
>-If ich sayde that thou hadde a bele chose, woldstow holde it ayeinst me?

Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something 
else is more important than fear.   --Ambrose Redmoon 
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