[Northkeep] OKay

Rene Shepard reneshepard at yahoo.com
Fri May 15 12:03:46 PDT 2009


OK. That beats my first bees in the hive by a mile. Oh my..Im still laughing..

Message: 7
Date: Fri, 15 May 2009 13:39:09 -0500
From: "Niewoehner, Hugh" <Hugh.Niewoehner at flightsafety.com>
Subject: [Northkeep] FW: Teach Archery to our Younger Generation!
To: <northkeep at ansteorra.org>
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    <0B4F682DE500EE4295674F0DA0385D7282C6B1 at srv060fssmx.ssd.fsi.com>
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OK...so I was harassed about this one yesterday so I'm supposed to share
with all of you.

    Damon
-----Original Message-----

>> This is why the boys will be archery hunting. It gets your blood
>> pumping. read below..... it is worth your time.
>>
>>
>> Around age 10 my dad got me one of those little badass
>> compound bow beginner kits.  Of course, the first month I went
around 
>> our
>> place sticking arrows in anything that could get stuck by an  arrow.
Did
>> you know that a 1955 40 horse Farmall tractor will take 6 rounds
before 
>> it goes  down?  Tough sumbich.
>>
>> That got boring, so being the 10 yr. old Dukes of  Hazzard
>> fan that I was, I quickly advanced to taking strips of cut up Tshirt
>> doused in chainsaw gas tied around the end and was sending flaming
arrows
>> all over the  place.  Keep in mind this was 99.999% humidity
swampland 
>> so
>> there  really wasn't any fire danger.  I'll put it this way -  a set
of
>> post hole  diggers and a 3ft. hole and you had yourself a well.
>>
>> Anyway, one summer afternoon, I was shooting flaming 
>> arrows
>> into a large rotten oak stump in our backyard.  I look over under the
>> carport and see a shiny brand new can of starting fluid (ether).
The
>> light bulb went off.  I grabbed the can and set it on the stump.  I
>> thought it would probably just spray out in a disappointing manner ..
.
>> lets  face it .  . to a 10 yr. old mouth-breather like myself ether 
>> really
>> doesn't  "sound"  flammable.  So, I went back into the house and got
a 1
>> pound can of  pyrodex  (black powder for muzzle loader rifles) to add
to
>> the excitement.
>>
>> At this point, I set the can of ether on the stump  and
>> opened  up the can of black powder.  My intentions were to sprinkle a
>> little bit  around the ether can but it all sorta dumped out on me.
No
>> biggie...1 lb  pyrodex and 16oz ether should make a loud pop, kinda
like a
>> firecracker you  know?  You know what?  Screw that.  I'm going back
in 
>> the
>> house for the  other can.  Yes, I got a second can of pyrodex and
dumped
>> it too.   Now we're  cookin'.
>>
>> I stepped back about 15ft and lit the 2stroke arrow.   I
>> drew  the nock to my cheek and took aim.  As I released I heard a
clunk
>> as the arrow launched from my bow.  In a slow motion time frame, I 
>> turned
>> to see my dad getting out of the truck... OH SH!T!  He just got home
>> from  work.  So  help me God it took 10 minutes for that arrow to go
from
>> my bow to the can.  My dad was walking towards me in slow motion with
a
>> WTF look in his  eyes.  I turned back towards my target just in time
to
>> see the arrow pierce the
>> starting fluid can right at the bottom.  Right through the main  pile
of
>> pyrodex and into the can.  Oh.  Shit.
>>
>> When the shock wave hit it knocked me off my feet.  I 
>> don't
>> know if it was the actual compression wave that threw me back or
just
>> reflex  jerk back from 235 fire trucking decibels of sound.  I caught
a
>> half a millisecond  glimpse of the violence during the initial
explosion
>> and I will  tell you  there was dust, grass, and bugs all hovering
1ft
>> above the ground as far as I could see.  It was like a little, low to
the
>> ground, layer of dust fog full of grasshoppers, spiders, and a
crawfish
>> or two.  The daylight turned
>> purple.  Let me repeat this...THE  DAYLIGHT TURNED PURPLE!  There
was a
>> big  sweetgum tree out by the gate going into the pasture.  Notice I 
>> said "was".  That mother got up and ran off.
>>
>> So here I am, on the ground blown completely out of my
>> shoes  with my Thundercats T-shirt shredded, my dad is on the other
side
>> of the  carport having what I can only assume is a Vietnam flashback
-
>> ECHO  BRAVO  CHARLIE YOUR BRINGIN' EM IN TOO CLOSE!!  CEASE FIRE
DAMIT
>> CEASE FIRE!!!!!
>> His hat has blown off and is 30 ft. behind him in the driveway.   All
>> windows on the north side of the house are blown out and there is a
slow
>> rolling mushroom cloud about 2000ft over our backyard.  There is a
Honda
>> 185s 3 wheeler parked on the other side of the yard and the fenders
are
>> drooped down and are now touching the tires.
>>
>> I wish I knew what I said to my dad at this moment.   I
>> don't  know- I know I said something.  I couldn't hear.  I couldn't
hear
>> inside my  own head.  I don't think he heard me either... not that it
>> would  really matter.  I don't remember much from this point on.  I
said
>> something, felt a sharp pain, and then woke up later.  I felt a sharp
>> pain, blacked  out, woke  later.... repeat this process for an hour
or so
>> and you get the  idea.  I remember at one point my mom had to give me
CPR
>> so dad could beat  me some more.  Bring him back to life so dad can
kill
>> him again. Thanks mom.
>>
>> One thing is for sure... I never had to mow around  that
>> stump  again.  Mom had been bitching about that thing for years and
dad
>> never did  anything about it.  I stepped up to the plate and handled
>> business.
>>
>> Dad sold his muzzleloaders a week or so later.  And I 
>> still
>> have some sort of bone growth abnormality either from the blast or
the
>> beating.  Or both.
>>
>> I guess what I'm trying to say is, get your kids into
>> archery..  Its good discipline and will teach them skills they can
use
>> later on in life.  Something they won't learn in school.



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