[Ravensfort] Funny Guy Stuff

Paul Gilbert niklas at pbgilbert.net
Tue Apr 9 07:15:14 PDT 2002

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH...........rolling on floor here.........


('m going to be sleeping on the couch when Kezia reads this!)


Great Stuff......I LOVE IT!!!


>    I ran across this, had to share it.
>                                                        Lochlann
>We always hear "the rules" from the feminine side. Ok - well now hear the
>guys' side ? These are our rules! Please note ...these are all numbered "1"
>1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
>1. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can
>find the perfect present yet again!
>1. Sometimes, we are not thinking about you. Live with it.
>1. Do not ask us what we are thinking about unless you are prepared to
>such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation, and NASCAR.
>1. Sunday =sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let
>it be.
>1. Shopping is NOT a sport, and no, we are never going to think of it that
>1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine.
>1. Crying is blackmail.
>1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not
>work. Strong hints do not work. Obvious hints do not work. Just say it!
>1. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar.
>Remind us frequently beforehand.
>1. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be
>good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?
>1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
>1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what
>do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
>1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
>1. Check your oil! Please.
>1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact,
>comments become null and void after 7 days.
>1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to
>like soap opera guys.
>1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways
>you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
>1. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.
>1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done not
>both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
>1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
>1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.
>1. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we
>were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your girlfriends.
>1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for
>example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea
>what mauve is.
>1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
>1. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading
>ability is not proof of how little we care about you.
>1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's
>wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
>1. I'm in shape. - ROUND is a shape.
>Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com[1].
>   1. http://g.msn.com/1HM505401/13
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Paul Gilbert,   KE5ZW                   H.E. Niklas Vasilevich,
Huntsville, Texas                       Baron of The Barony Raven's Fort
niklas at pbgilbert.net                    CSM, Crane, ORH, KGA , AoA
936-291-9532 home                               Kingdom of Ansteorra
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