[Ravensfort] Funny Guy Stuff

Olivia G. Rodrigues ladyoliviar at lycos.com
Tue Apr 9 07:55:13 PDT 2002

The goode Lochlann has messed up.
Women may have "The Rules" but we certainly don't share them with MEN and now that we women know "The Other Side" we will find ways to combat them!

I'll let you in on one of "The Rules";
23.  It doesn't matter what you do, you're wrong, even if you're alone in a forest!



Carpe Diem Ex Illo Vitae Opprime!

On Tue, 09 Apr 2002 09:15:14
 Paul Gilbert wrote:
>HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH...........rolling on floor here.........
>('m going to be sleeping on the couch when Kezia reads this!)
>Great Stuff......I LOVE IT!!!
>>    I ran across this, had to share it.
>>                                                        Lochlann
>>We always hear "the rules" from the feminine side. Ok - well now hear the
>>guys' side ? These are our rules! Please note ...these are all numbered "1"
>>1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it
>>1. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversaries are not quests to see if we can
>>find the perfect present yet again!
>>1. Sometimes, we are not thinking about you. Live with it.
>>1. Do not ask us what we are thinking about unless you are prepared to
>>such topics as navel lint, the shotgun formation, and NASCAR.
>>1. Sunday =sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let
>>it be.
>>1. Shopping is NOT a sport, and no, we are never going to think of it that
>>1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine.
>>1. Crying is blackmail.
>>1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not
>>work. Strong hints do not work. Obvious hints do not work. Just say it!
>>1. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar.
>>Remind us frequently beforehand.
>>1. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be
>>good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?
>>1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
>>1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what
>>do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
>>1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
>>1. Check your oil! Please.
>>1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact,
>>comments become null and void after 7 days.
>>1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to
>>like soap opera guys.
>>1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways
>>you sad or angry, we meant the other one.
>>1. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.
>>1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done not
>>both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
>>1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during
>>1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.
>>1. The relationship is never going to be like it was the first two months we
>>were going out. Get over it. And quit whining to your girlfriends.
>>1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for
>>example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea
>>what mauve is.
>>1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
>>1. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading
>>ability is not proof of how little we care about you.
>>1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's
>>wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.
>>1. I'm in shape. - ROUND is a shape.
>>Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com[1].
>>   1. http://g.msn.com/1HM505401/13
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>>Ravensfort at ansteorra.org
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>Paul Gilbert,   KE5ZW                   H.E. Niklas Vasilevich,
>Huntsville, Texas                       Baron of The Barony Raven's Fort
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See Dave Matthews Band live or win a signed guitar

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