[Ravensfort] OT, LOTM

Epps, David ICC_DCE at SHSU.EDU
Thu Sep 24 10:04:03 PDT 2009

Being Dutch Elm It should probably be... Zegen u


From: ravensfort-bounces+icc_dce=shsu.edu at lists.ansteorra.org [mailto:ravensfort-bounces+icc_dce=shsu.edu at lists.ansteorra.org] On Behalf Of Hoffpauir, David
Sent: Thursday, September 24, 2009 11:56 AM
To: Raven's Fort Barony of
Subject: [Ravensfort] OT, LOTM

The Lord of the Manor would have me announce:

We had a huge Dutch Elm in the far-down yard covered with climbing fig.  It had a face
attached to it made from bits of mortar formed into eyes and lids and a brow.  It had a
mouth, with fleshy lips and a big toothy smile. It also had a nose, just like your nose,
only bigger.  Framed in the climbing fig, I'd often think of the Great Mythical Hunter Herne,
from Celtic lore, or his more familiar incarnation, The Green Man.

The other night, in the middle of the night, for no apparent reason at all, the great
tree broke off across the trunk about six feet up or four inches below Herne's chin.
All was quiet and still.  One pop, and a pause...  Then another "POP!" ...and a long
pregnant pause...  Then with a crash that echoed out and down all this rolling valley's
miles, the great tree fell.

I won't mention much on all the domestic frenzy which ensued from two adults and two
dogs, all lying in bed together, in the dead, pitch dark of a rural country night, as
all scrambled for what each considered to be their own notion of "safety."  It was a
tangled mess of carbon based life forms, to say the least, but the tree fell far enough
away that none was harmed.

The next morning when we looked, Herne's eyes and mouth remained in place. His toothy
smile askew and now parallel with the ground.  His eyes were a wee bit kilter, with a
crossed look and crumpled brow like that of a goat that had eaten something bitter.  The
nose was gone.  It lay in the grass some distance away, nostrils up, and backwards,
flared and full of saw dust.  We surmise, after eighty years of gnats and flies and ant
trails, of tickly squirrel tails and woodpecker pecks, dust and saw dust, and pollen
and other things blown in on the air, that the great tree had simply sneezed...

Bless you, Herne.  Thanks for missing the house.


David R. Hoffpauir
Program Development Associate w/
~Incident Command Simulation Training Center~
~LEMIT Technolgy Development Center~
~South Texas Applied Forensic Science Facility (STAFS)~
Bill Blackwood Law Enforcement Management Institute of Texas
College of Criminal Justice
Sam Houston State University
Huntsville Tx 77341-3926

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