SC - Re:Children from H*ll

[Louise Sugar]

Oh Lord!!!   Been there, done that, tossed the teddy and the giraffe  :D


- -----Original Message-----
From: Sabia <sabia at unm.edu>
To: sca-cooks at Ansteorra.ORG <sca-cooks at Ansteorra.ORG>
Date: Thursday, October 16, 1997 12:15 AM
Subject: SC - Sorry off topic humour


>
>Sorry, but this hit a funny bone, especially since my 6yr old and I just
>finishe our baking experience of the week.
>
>
>Mom's Brownies
>
>Remove teddy bear from oven and preheat oven to 375.
>Melt 1 cup margarine in saucepan.
>Remove teddy bear from oven and tell Jr "no, no."
>Add margarine to 2 cups sugar.
>Take shortening can away from Jr. and clean cupboards.
>Measure 1/3 cup cocoa.
>Take shortening can away from Jr. again and bathe cat.
>Apply antiseptic and bandages to scratches sustained
>Take shortening can away from Jr. again and bathe cat.
>Apply antiseptic and bandages to scratches sustained
>while removing shortening from cat's tail.
>Assemble 4 eggs, 2 tsp. vanilla, and 1-1/2 cups sifted flour.
>Take smoldering teddy bear from oven and open all doors
>and windows for ventilation.
>Take telephone away from Billy and assure party on the
>line the call was a mistake. Call operator and attempt to
>have direct dialed call removed from bill.
>Measure 1 tsp. salt, 1/2 cup nuts and beat all ingredients well.
>Let cat out of refrigerator.
>Pour mixture into well-greased 9x13-inch pan.
>Bake 25 minutes.
>Rescue cat and take razor away from Billy. Explain to kids that you have
>no
>idea if shaved cats will sunburn. Throw cat outside while there's still
>time and he's still able to run away.
>
>FROSTING
>
>Mix the following in saucepan:
>
>     1 cup sugar
>     1 oz unsweetened chocolate
>     1/4 cup margarine
>
>Take the teddy bear out of the broiler and throw it away -- far away.
>Answer the door and meekly explain to nice policeman that you didn't know
>Jr had slipped out of the house and was heading for the street. Put Jr in
>playpen.
>Add 1/3 cup milk, dash of salt, and boil, stirring constantly for 2
>minutes.
>Answer door and apologize to neighbor for Billy having stuck a garden hose
>in man's front door mail slot. Promise to pay for ruined carpet.
>Tie Billy to clothesline.
>Remove burned brownies from oven.
>
>Thanks to Stephen D. Hoschler for this contribution
>
>
>
>
>Sabia of St Kildas {sabia at unm.edu}
>
>
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=
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