SC - Fw: [SD] Feast of the Martyrs

Tue Jun 1 22:32:24 PDT 1999

Thought I'd send this third-party review of a feast I was involved in
this weekend to the list.  Comments in the [ ]'s are mine.  
My dish was the Rice St. Agatha. 
	Christianna

- --------- Forwarded message ----------
From: "Maxwell, Bambi" <X2MAXWEL at southernco.com>
To: "'southdowns at egroups.com'" <southdowns at egroups.com>
Date: Tue, 1 Jun 1999 14:56:30 -0500
Subject: [SD] Feast of the Martyrs

Good gentles of the list, greetings!

Those who could not attend Kingdom Arts and Sciences this weekend or who
left the event before feast on Sunday, heed now this account of Chef
Cotehardee and the wondrous Feast of the Martyrs!

Sunday afternoon, in the presence of Their Royal Majesties, His
Excellency the Baron of South Downs bade all still on site to enjoy the
feast as largesse of the barony, regardless of whether they held feast
tokens.  The hall was prepared and all were seated. Good Christians
passed the interval before feast in contemplation of the martyrs; their
study was aided by trading cards of the saints supplied by The Honourable
Lord Conmaol O'Maolmhoicheirghe. 
[The trading cards were hotly sought after the feast was over, I
overheard one lady saying "I've got two Virgins and I only need one!"]

At only a few moments past the appointed hour, Chef Cotehardee dispatched
his retainers into the hall to serve the feast.  Master Cathal announced
each course with appropriate solemnity.

The servers first brought forth trays of cheese and bread.  Spokes of
bright cheddar arrayed around Provolone in the center of each tray
betokened St. Katherine's wheel.  [St. Katherine's Wheel of Cheese]
The stoned meal of the bread represented St. Stephen.

Next came forth heads on platters, reminding all of St. John the Baptist.
Each head (of lettuce) stood in a pool of blood (French dressing).
[St. John the Baptist's Head of Lettuce Salad]

Master Cathal, keeping everyone abreast of the progress of the chef's
crew, then announced a titillating dish in honor of St. Agatha:  twin
mounds of rice, artfully sprinkled with paprika on top and garnished with
a small scoop of poppy seeds in the center of each mound.
[My favorite comment from the crowd - "A perky little dish"]

Along with St. Agatha's rice came onions, mushrooms and zucchini slices
skewered in memory of St. Sebastian. Unlike St. Sebastian, the vegetables
had been grilled after they were pierced.

Chef Cotehardee then presented his tribute to St. Valentine: baked
chicken clubs (drumsticks). 
[Valentine was beaten with clubs during his persecution.]

Next came forth ripe olives stuffed with cream cheese.  The hardier souls
among us were invited to imagine St. Lucy's eyes. [It was actually
provolone, and it did bring up some textural images that could have been
eyeballs]

With the next course we all became persecutors of the faithful.  The
servers brought out platters of gingerbread martyrs to be dipped in pitch
(Hershey's chocolate syrup).  Rumors swept the hall that our beloved
queen and the tanista of Gleann Abhean were devising savage deaths for
the martyrs, and this news cheered the populace, as none present was
without guilt.
[Their Majesties were spearing the martyrs with the bamboo skewers,
dripping 'pitch' from their wounds, and holding them over candles to
toast them, perhaps waiting for them to confess or repent...]

Master Cathal then announced a surpise course of spinach and hard-boiled
eggs.  I grieve to confess that I cannot remember the saint associated
with this delicious dish.
[It was Spinach Kent.  It was for Beckett, and the {rather loose, IMO}
association with the saint was that the spinach was chopped and creamed
;P.  The hors d'oerve spears through the boiled eggs was a nice touch,
though]

At last came the course that all had eagerly awaited since day before,
when the chef's minion, Lord Damon, tortured all in camp with the divine
aroma of ribs barbecuing on an outdoor grill. Chef Cotehardee presented
these ribs in reverence of St. Laurence.  [That's my boy!  He is proud to
tell that his grilling is AoA award winning BBQ!  He'll be cooking for
the Meridian party this year at Pennsic again, by the way ;) ]

Finally Master Cathal, armed with a fire extinguisher, led from the
kitchen
all of the chef's helpers bearing the piece de resistance, a course in
honor
of St. Joan of Arc.  As the populace watched in awe, cherries
representing
the Maid of Orleans were flamed with brandy.  The tasty result was served
over late-period gelatto. [Vanilla ice-cream]

His Royal Majesty, wishing to pay compliments to the author of so grand a
feast, sent to the kitchen for Chef Cotehardee.  Alas, the chef was not
to be found.  In his absence, the populace saluted his helpers:  Lord
Conmaol and Donya Ximena, Mistress Rhiannon, Mistress Christianna, Lady
Tara, Lord Damon, Lady Victoria, Lady Emma and many others.
[Actually, Cotehardee and the whole idea for the feast were a large
Baronial Brain Fart at a local restaurant after a meeting about a month
ago.  With no volunteers for Sunday night's feast, it just sort of fell
together....]

Thus the lives and deaths of the martyrs were celebrated, and the
populace presented with food for thought!

Respectfully,
Bride Albanach   

It was a great feast.  We didn't even know what the order of service was
until it was going out, but everyone did a single dish, and we didn't
even trip over each other much.  It was very much a 'seat of our pants'
production.   The accolades we got included "The most fun I've ever had
at a feast!".  And for all the clowning around, it was a very tasty
repast, too.  
Christianna

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