SC - recipe for za'tar

[LrdRas@aol.com]

I think the members of this list would enjoy this.  It was sent to my
father-in-law by his cousin. 

Sindara



>Of course my mother would have followed the following to the T...This is
>boilerplate Rosie, but I thought you would like to see it too.
>Beth
>
>The Subject of Making Gefilte Fish
>>
>> 21 Steps to the proper preparation of GEFILTE FISH
>>
>> Step 1:  Two weeks before a major Jewish holiday, call your daughter and
>ask
>> her what she plans to serve for the festive meal.  Express your outrage
>when
>> she suggests serving doctored up canned gefilte fish.  Offer to make the
>> fish yourself.
>>
>> Step 2: Suggest that your daughter take a day off from work so that she
>can
>> watch you make the fish, so she'll know how to do it for her kids after
>she
>> has put you in The Home.  Two days before the holiday, call your daughter
>> and
>> tell her you hate to disappoint her, but you simply don't have the
>strength
>> to make gefilte fish.
>>
>> Step 3: While your daughter is racing all over looking for a substitute
>> appetizer, get all dressed up and take a bus...and a subway... and another
>> bus.
>>
>> Step 4: Go to an obscure fish store in a slum where they sell LIVE CARP.
>>
>> Step 5: Examine the carp swimming around in the fish tank.  Ask the owner
>if
>> any fresher carp will be arriving soon.
>>
>> Step 6:  On principle, reject the first two that he offers you.
>>
>> Step 7: Accept the third or fourth.  Allow him to fillet and clean the
>carp,
>> but NEVER let him put your fish near the electric grinder.  Far be it for
>> you to accuse anyone unjustly, but you know he has ground dead carp in it.
>>
>> Step 8: Lugging three heavy shopping bags filled with fish, take three
>buses
>> home, unless someone has told you about a way of taking a fourth.
>>
>> Step 9: Call your daughter and tell her that you felt a little bit better
>> and decided to go to your special store and pick up the carp. You know how
>> busy she is right before the holidays so you didn't want to ask her to
>drive
>> all the way out there.
>>
>> Step 10: Tell her how exhausted you are and describe in detail the
>assassin
>> who tried to steal your pocketbook as you were boarding the second bus.
>> Inquire whether your daughter would mind picking you up.  You wouldn't
>> normally ask, but it's much easier to make the gefilte fish in her kitchen
>> because she has all the latest electric gadgets.
>>
>> Step 11: Remove several washed mixing bowls from your daughter's
>dishwasher
>> and rinse them to make sure they are clean.
>>
>> Step 12: There should be a separate bowl for each ingredient so that dirt
>> from the carrots will not get on the celery.  Put the diced carrots in one
>> bowl, the sliced celery in the second, the chopped onions in the third and
>> combine them all in a fourth bowl.  Ask your daughter to stop whatever
>she's
>> doing and come and watch you.
>>
>> Step 13: Eye your daughter's food processor with suspicion.  Ask her to
>help
>> you operate it, chop the carp in it for 15 seconds, then move all the
>> ingredients into your ancient wooden chopping bowl.
>>
>> Step 14: Rev up those Haddasah arms and attack the ingredients with a
>> dull-bladed hockmesser for 90 minutes.  Demand that your daughter
>> acknowledge
>> the superiority of your withered arm over a horsepower motor.
>>
>> Step 15: Place your hand on your chest and moan.  Accept your daughter's
>> offer to help.  Give her the bowl and the hockmesser.
>>
>> Step 16: Twelve seconds later, snatch the bowl and chopper out of your
>> daughter's hands. Tell her to watch carefully so she'll be more of a help
>> next year.  Pulverize the fish with your chopper for another 32 minutes.
>>
>> Step 17: On the bottom of a cast-iron pot with a non matching lid (rescued
>> by your mother during a pogrom and brought in steerage to America),
>arrange
>> slices of carrots, onions, celery, fish heads, skin and bones.
>>
>> Step 18: Form the chopped fish mush into oval patties and lay them gently
>on
>> top of the ingredients in the pot.
>>
>> Step 19: Add liquid and seasonings.  Bring to a boil, lower to simmer,
>cover
>> the pot and let the fish cook till they're ready and taste good...but not
>as
>> good as last year's.
>>
>> Step 20: After the patties cool, arrange them on a beautiful serving
>platter
>> for your daughter and her guests.  Dump the heads, skin, and bones in a
>> chipped bowl for yourself.  Practice saying that the heads and the bones
>are
>> the tastiest portions until you sound convincing.
>>
>> Step 21:  The morning after the holiday, call your daughter and tell her
>> that you just tasted a piece of bottled fish that was even more delicious
>> than what she served last night.  Tell her it's a shame she made it from
>> scratch when everyone does such wonderful things with canned.
>>
>> Morsels and Memories by Mayra Chanin
>>
>
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