SC - Unwelcome at SCA events? (OT?)
lilinah at grin.net
lilinah at grin.net
Wed Jan 19 13:15:20 PST 2000
My first event (other than attending a very early event in probably
1968 or 69 in Berkeley CA) was in Caid at a Twelfth Night in the
mid-to-late-1980's as a merchant. I came in Middle Eastern costume
selling homemade herbal soaps, bath bags, and bath salts, and while i
wasn't "warmly" welcomed into events (i was, after all, a merchant
stuck at a table :-), no one was rude and many folks chatted with me
and i with them.
The "worst" thing that happened was i came upon a woman wearing a
dress (either Burgundian or Italian Renaissance - i can't remember
which anymore, but it had a high waist) of the same fabric as my
mid-calf length vest. I called out with a smile "You must have bought
your fabric from my Uncle Omar the cloth merchant". She gave me a
sour look. Turns out she was the Queen. And you know how women feel
about wearing the same dress, or in this case, the same
black-purple-green-and-gold brocade. So i didn't take it personally.
Then i went to a Greco-Roman Saturday tourney in a park. I knew no
one there and just wandered about. I certainly didn't expect to be
embraced by a bunch of people to whom i was a stranger, so i viewed
the event as interesting and a "learning experience", so i could see
what SCA events were like. People did talk to me and no one snubbed
me that i recall.
Then i went to a very small event at Cal Tech in Pasadena and was
warmly welcomed by the motley crew of Middle Easterners there, who
invited me into their pavilion and with whom i ate dinner that
evening in a local restaurant (all of us still in costume).
I also attended a Collegium Caidis and again, while i didn't know too
many people other than a few of the Middle Easterners (and they said
hello to me), i had a wonderful time learning about all sorts of
amazing topics. I highly recommend Collegia or whatever similar
events your Kingdom may have as a great way to "break the ice",
assuming, of course, that it isn't a great hardship to get to one...
Then i hooked up for around 1/2 a year or a year with the College of
San Ambrosio (UCLA) shortly after it was founded. Because the College
had just started, there were people (like me) who were not students
at UCLA who were involved. I'm shy myself, so i rarely get very
socially involved and always feel like an outsider - that's my
problem. But a number of people invited me to join in singing
madrigals and come to other things, and no one was particularly rude.
Then i moved to the West in the fall of 1988 and didn't involve
myself in other SCA events, as i had lots of other things keeping me
busy, until the spring of 1999, when i joined a bunch of SCA e-mail
lists, and then was invited to camp with a Shire which, while in the
same Principality where i live, is over 1 hour drive away (i'm in a
populous area - i'm more-or-less in Berkeley, the Shire is on the
cusp of San Jose and Mountain View). I pitched in and helped cook and
do stuff and didn't expect them to entertain me, and i have been
warmly welcomed. The local Berkeley folks (Province of the Mists) are
not unfriendly, but they're a bit, well, disorganized and, uh, laid
back, so i've hooked up with more "organized" folks a bit farther
away.
I don't have a car, and my consort only goes to Crown Tourneys 3
times a year, so i have to ask for rides. Thus far people have been
generous and i've only missed one event for want of a ride (and two
people offered but had to bow out at the last minute).
I imagine there are not only regional cultural differences in the US,
but also differences in various Baronies, Shires, Provinces, etc.
based on the personalities of the leaders and other folks involved.
If you're interested in the SCA but don't know who to hang out with,
i'd suggest that you get on your local Kingdom mailing list and send
a message asking what group is closest to you.
If after contacting, who is it, the Seneschal? of your most local
group, going to a couple events and they still aren't too welcoming,
try to make contact with more sympathetic folks via your local or
Kingdom mailing list.
I also just noticed (surfing SCA sites) that the Kingdom of Caid has
a Newcomer's Guild. Perhaps other Kingdoms do, too. So, if you've
been to one event and felt left out, there are other ways to make
friendly contacts.
I still don't always know who to salaam, but no one has been rude to
me because of it. When in doubt, i courteously nod my head to crowns
and coronets passing by.
Anahita Gauri al-shazhiya bint-Karim al-hakim al-Fassi
*/\*/\*/\*/\*/\*/\*/\*/\*/\*/\*/\*/\*/\*/\*/\*/\*/\*/\*
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