[Sca-cooks] Fw: [Bright Hills] "Humor"

[chirhart_1]

----- Original Message -----
From: "Marian Rosenberg" <Marian at TheRosenbergFamilies.Net>
To: <brighthills at yahoogroups.com>
Sent: Saturday, September 01, 2001 12:30 AM

>
> In my experience of lists in general, it is inappropriate to send
> forwards of "funnies" to lists, especially when the "funnies" do not
> seem to have a direct correlation to the list topic.
>
> Thus, I contribute this:
>
> *****************************************************
> **************FORWARD AUTO-RESPONSE 1.01*************
> **************** for "cute" forwards ****************
> ******************** (c) awt '98 ********************
> ************ special MILD FLAMING ACTION ************
> ********** for relief of gentle annoyances **********
> ********** when the Clue Bat is too strong **********
> *****************************************************
>
>    -CHECK AS MANY AS APPLY-
>
> Dear
>      [ ] friend who has only recently gotten online
>      [ ] cow orker
>      [ ] distant relative
>      [ ] acquaintance with a long CC list
>      [ ] mystery [l]user
>      [X] list member
>
> Thank you very much for sending me
>
>      [ ] a 5 gigabyte GIF of your children
>      [ ] a .WAV file that took 4 hours to download
>           and half an hour to play
>      [ ] a list of why some household object is
>           better than men
>      [ ] a Touching Inspirational Story (tm)
>         [ ] typed verbatim from "Chicken Soup for
>            the Soul"
>         [ ] featuring big-eyed children
>            [ ] dying of cancer
>      [X] more goddamn heartwarming shit
>      [ ] a VERY IMPORTANT VIRUS WARNING!!!1!1!!
>      [ ] something with so many >>>s that I couldn't
>           ascertain the original content
>      [ ] that story about the guy with the JATO
>           crashing into the mountain
>      [ ] a chain letter that, if not spammed to 50
>           to fifty other addresses, proves that I'm
>           not really your friend
>      [ ] a request to send cards to Craig Shergold
>      [ ] the Neiman Marcus cookie story
>      [X] an urban legend not specified here
>      [ ] the Darwin Awards
>      [ ] jokes from last night's
>         [ ] Letterman
>         [ ] Leno
>         [ ] Saturday Night Live
>         [ ] 700 Club
>      [ ] list of {number} Funny Things to Do in a/n
>           {public place}
>      [X] other 'net "humor" that has already been
>           sent to every account on the planet, twice
>      [ ] a message CC'd to every account on the
>           planet, twice
>
> As much as I value
>
>      [ ] your friendship
>      [ ] working together
>      [ ] sharing up to 50% of your genes
>      [ ] waving briefly when we see each
>           other in the supermarket
>      [ ] random lunatics finding my email address
>      [X] being on the same list
>
>   I must request that you cease sending me this sort
> of material.
>
> Please consider
>
>      [ ] using your SHIFT key
>      [ ] taking advantage of the many punctuation
>           marks available to modern society
>      [ ] investing in a spellchecker
>      [ ] learning the difference between
>        [ ] too, to, two
>        [ ] they're, their, there
>        [ ] its, it's
>      [ ] not sending email formatted in HTML
>         [ ] that uses the <blink> command
>         [ ] that uses light purple text on neon green
>              background
>      [ ] sending the URL of images, rather than
>           attaching the image
>      [ ] sending the URL of .wavs, rather than
>           attaching the .wav
>      [ ] sending the URL of long, frequently-
>           forwarded text pieces, so that on the off-
>           chance that I haven't seen them before, I
>           can see them without >>>>>>> before every
>           line.
>      [X] setting your line wrap to 72 characters or
>           under
>      [X] actually writing me with your opinions and
>           stories from your life, rather than
>           forwarding drivel about "true friendship"
>      [ ] learning that opening an email message
>           cannot infect your computer with a virus
>      [ ] doing a little research before passing on an
>           urban legend as fact
>      [X] being original
>
> Thank you for taking the time to amend your behavior.
>
> URLs possibly helpful in this pursuit include:
>
> http://www.snopes.com
>    Urban legends reference pages
>   http://www.snopes.com/spoons
>      Current urban legends and net humor ("faxlore")
>
> http://www.inso.com/qvp/webfaq.htm
>    Inexpensive spelling/grammar check plugin for
>     Netscape
>
> http://www.buffnet.net/~dhskibum/humor.htm
> http://home.sol.no/~kiki205/
> http://www.cyber.com.au/users/kig/jokes/index.html
> http://laffnow.com/
> http://web0.tiac.net/users/kat/humor/
>    Various archives of online humor
>
> http://www.sophos.com/virusinfo/scares/
> http://whatis.com/virushoa.htm
> http://www.stiller.com/hoaxes.htm
>    Details on "VIRUS WARNING!!1!!" hoaxes
>
> The Internet can be a valuable tool, both for work
> and recreation.  Don't act like a hillbilly in the
> Big City, gawking at the cement ponds and the lists
> of 100 Zany Ways to Order a Pizza.  Learn your way
> around.  Make it work for you.  And quit forwarding
> me everything that hits your inbox.
>
> Yours,
>   Marian
>
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>
>
>
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>
>

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