[Sca-cooks] Fw: [Bright Hills] "Humor"
chirhart_1
chirhart_1 at netzero.net
Fri Aug 31 22:13:31 PDT 2001
----- Original Message -----
From: "Marian Rosenberg" <Marian at TheRosenbergFamilies.Net>
To: <brighthills at yahoogroups.com>
Sent: Saturday, September 01, 2001 12:30 AM
>
> In my experience of lists in general, it is inappropriate to send
> forwards of "funnies" to lists, especially when the "funnies" do not
> seem to have a direct correlation to the list topic.
>
> Thus, I contribute this:
>
> *****************************************************
> **************FORWARD AUTO-RESPONSE 1.01*************
> **************** for "cute" forwards ****************
> ******************** (c) awt '98 ********************
> ************ special MILD FLAMING ACTION ************
> ********** for relief of gentle annoyances **********
> ********** when the Clue Bat is too strong **********
> *****************************************************
>
> -CHECK AS MANY AS APPLY-
>
> Dear
> [ ] friend who has only recently gotten online
> [ ] cow orker
> [ ] distant relative
> [ ] acquaintance with a long CC list
> [ ] mystery [l]user
> [X] list member
>
> Thank you very much for sending me
>
> [ ] a 5 gigabyte GIF of your children
> [ ] a .WAV file that took 4 hours to download
> and half an hour to play
> [ ] a list of why some household object is
> better than men
> [ ] a Touching Inspirational Story (tm)
> [ ] typed verbatim from "Chicken Soup for
> the Soul"
> [ ] featuring big-eyed children
> [ ] dying of cancer
> [X] more goddamn heartwarming shit
> [ ] a VERY IMPORTANT VIRUS WARNING!!!1!1!!
> [ ] something with so many >>>s that I couldn't
> ascertain the original content
> [ ] that story about the guy with the JATO
> crashing into the mountain
> [ ] a chain letter that, if not spammed to 50
> to fifty other addresses, proves that I'm
> not really your friend
> [ ] a request to send cards to Craig Shergold
> [ ] the Neiman Marcus cookie story
> [X] an urban legend not specified here
> [ ] the Darwin Awards
> [ ] jokes from last night's
> [ ] Letterman
> [ ] Leno
> [ ] Saturday Night Live
> [ ] 700 Club
> [ ] list of {number} Funny Things to Do in a/n
> {public place}
> [X] other 'net "humor" that has already been
> sent to every account on the planet, twice
> [ ] a message CC'd to every account on the
> planet, twice
>
> As much as I value
>
> [ ] your friendship
> [ ] working together
> [ ] sharing up to 50% of your genes
> [ ] waving briefly when we see each
> other in the supermarket
> [ ] random lunatics finding my email address
> [X] being on the same list
>
> I must request that you cease sending me this sort
> of material.
>
> Please consider
>
> [ ] using your SHIFT key
> [ ] taking advantage of the many punctuation
> marks available to modern society
> [ ] investing in a spellchecker
> [ ] learning the difference between
> [ ] too, to, two
> [ ] they're, their, there
> [ ] its, it's
> [ ] not sending email formatted in HTML
> [ ] that uses the <blink> command
> [ ] that uses light purple text on neon green
> background
> [ ] sending the URL of images, rather than
> attaching the image
> [ ] sending the URL of .wavs, rather than
> attaching the .wav
> [ ] sending the URL of long, frequently-
> forwarded text pieces, so that on the off-
> chance that I haven't seen them before, I
> can see them without >>>>>>> before every
> line.
> [X] setting your line wrap to 72 characters or
> under
> [X] actually writing me with your opinions and
> stories from your life, rather than
> forwarding drivel about "true friendship"
> [ ] learning that opening an email message
> cannot infect your computer with a virus
> [ ] doing a little research before passing on an
> urban legend as fact
> [X] being original
>
> Thank you for taking the time to amend your behavior.
>
> URLs possibly helpful in this pursuit include:
>
> http://www.snopes.com
> Urban legends reference pages
> http://www.snopes.com/spoons
> Current urban legends and net humor ("faxlore")
>
> http://www.inso.com/qvp/webfaq.htm
> Inexpensive spelling/grammar check plugin for
> Netscape
>
> http://www.buffnet.net/~dhskibum/humor.htm
> http://home.sol.no/~kiki205/
> http://www.cyber.com.au/users/kig/jokes/index.html
> http://laffnow.com/
> http://web0.tiac.net/users/kat/humor/
> Various archives of online humor
>
> http://www.sophos.com/virusinfo/scares/
> http://whatis.com/virushoa.htm
> http://www.stiller.com/hoaxes.htm
> Details on "VIRUS WARNING!!1!!" hoaxes
>
> The Internet can be a valuable tool, both for work
> and recreation. Don't act like a hillbilly in the
> Big City, gawking at the cement ponds and the lists
> of 100 Zany Ways to Order a Pizza. Learn your way
> around. Make it work for you. And quit forwarding
> me everything that hits your inbox.
>
> Yours,
> Marian
>
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>
>
>
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