[Sca-cooks] Well, my teasing has backfired

[Michael Gunter]

Poor Selene was recruited into cooking the Thanksgiving turkey and
dressing for the "orphan's dinner" here in Phoenix as I was in Texas.
Now, Selene is a rather indifferent cook. I'm sure she can do it but
it just isn't her thing. But she was drafted and she gamely went for it.

I wasn't able to help her much because of other issues as well as being
out of town but I gave her as much advice as I could. I did tease
her a lot about ordering pizza or having the local supermarket cook
one for here. But Selene is...well...persistant. She researched the
hell out of turkey cooking. Asked dozens of questions. Stressed like
no tomorrow. But gamely went about browning the bird.

I can't give an accurate account of the whole proceedings but the
end result was that she cooked it in a roasting bag. The cavity was
filled with apples and onions and herbs and such. I mean literally
stuffed so much with the aromatics that the turkey cooked the
same length of time as if stuffing had been cooked in it.

She did use the meat thermometer method although it took exactly
as long as the package said. I've been told that an intervention was
done to prevent her from checking on it every five minutes.

But I'm commanded to report that the turkey was roasted, brown,
juicy, and nobody died. Okay, so it was roasted upside down and
she didn't know what that big hole in the bottom of the bird was.

But, other than that, a fully successful operation. And I can only eat
my words because there is no turkey left.

Gunthar



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