[Sca-cooks] food dislikes, cultural mores and being polite. was Re: Re: P B & J
judith at ipstenu.org
Thu Aug 27 05:16:54 PDT 2009
On Aug 26, 2009, at 9:41 PM, David Friedman wrote:
>> It occurs to me that one part of the question that hasn't been
>> discussed is the nature of the dinner. If we're inviting one other
>> couple over and making one main dish--as we would if cooking for
>> ourselves--then someone not eating that dish is a substantial
>> problem. If we are having a dinner party with, say, six guests, and
>> making two or three main dishes, in part because we're doing
>> medieval cooking and want our guests to experience a range of it,
>> then someone who doesn't eat one dish eats something else and there
>> is no problem.
> Antonia writes:
>> I wouldn't dream of suggesting that my hosts forego cooking
>> something they (or other guests) like because I don't care for it.
>> I don't know why you're so wound up about it.
> I wonder if part of the problem is that you are imagining a dinner
> party with lots of guests and lots of dishes, Judith a more intimate
> occasion with one or two guests and a much smaller range of dishes.
Yes, of course I'm imagining one person or couple coming to my home,
not a whole army. My table seats four -- six, if two or three are
children. Even if I could serve a dozen at a time, though, I make one
to three entrees (that is, the salad or soup with which you 'enter'
the meal), one main dish, one dessert. This isn't a restaurant, it's
my home. When you eat by me, you're family. That's why it's important
that I know what people can't eat. If I don't know that one person
hates peppers, one is allergic to nuts, one throws up or gets a rash
from curry, and one is taking medication that may interact adversely
with dairy products, I may wind up making a dish that involves all
four items, and nobody will be able to eat anything but salad and ice
cream. They'll leave my table unsatisfied, making me a very poor host
for not caring enough to ask the questions earlier that will make it
easier for the guests to enjoy my bounty.
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