[Sca-cooks] Certified Nutritionists, was, Re: Hroar is home!!!

Phil Troy / G. Tacitus Adamantius adamantius1 at verizon.net
Mon Jun 1 08:32:05 PDT 2009

On Jun 1, 2009, at 10:30 AM, Susan Fox wrote:

> I once had to explain to a certified nutritionist that Tofu was not  
> a dairy product and describe the entire manufacturing process to  
> her.  That's when I gave up certified nutritionists.  ::headdesk::   
> My protege's lady is in school to become one, even though I've told  
> her repeatedly that she is already overqualified.

I kid you not. Dateline, last year, Mount Sinai Hospital, New York  
City, one of the best hospitals in the world. All things are as they  
were, but today, You Are There:

Nutritionist: Now you have to watch out for some hidden calories in  
tofu -- most people just assume it's always low in calories.

Patient: Really? I'm surprised. I always understood it was high in  
protein and calcium, easy to digest, and comparatively low in fat.  
Where do the hidden calories come from?

Nutritionist: They come from soy.

Patient: Soy?

Nutritionist: Soy.

Patient: I'm sorry, I must not be understanding you. I mean, what is  
it in the tofu that is the source of the calories? I mean, is it fat,  
sugar, starches, some kind of complex carbohydrate, what? Obviously  
it's going to have some caloric value, but what, specifically, is it  
that makes it so calorie-laden in such an unexpected manner? I know  
things like Tofutti can be very highly caloric, but they have a lot of  
stuff added to them...

Nutritionist [checks computer display for inspiration]:  
Ummm... ... ...soy...

Patient: What do you mean, 'soy'? Is there something in soybeans I  
should know about?

Nutritionist: Soybeans are very high in... soy.

This is the same lady to whom it had never occurred that Jello is  
called Jello because it either does, or once did, contain gelatin,  
which is a protein source.

She probably earns more in a year than my family.


"Most men worry about their own bellies, and other people's souls,  
when we all ought to worry about our own souls, and other people's  
			-- Rabbi Israel Salanter

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