[Scriptoris] RE: [Scribes] Overworked? (Saying "NO")
hillaryrg at yahoo.com
Mon Jun 16 09:50:32 PDT 2003
I really liked what this lady said on the SCA Scribes list (see below) and
thought it bore repeating. Please, please do not let your hobby in the SCA
take over your life and make you unhappy if you find yourself overcommitted
and overworked doing scribal requests. Learn to say 'no' if you honestly
are not able to do something, or it would infringe upon the rest of your
life or work time.
Luckily in Ansteorra, we don't do handmade scrolls for every award, so that
gives us a bit more time to work on these prize scrolls and special
competition pieces, to enjoy our fun.
> Your "NO" has exactly as much weight as you give it. If you allow people
> to argue you out of stuff... or if you say "no" when you mean "maybe,
> convince me you really want it"... then people will learn that the proper
> response to "no" is to argue, plead, look at you with puppy eyes.
> That everybody looks to you when something "artsy" needs to happen is a
> compliment. That they push you to take on more than you are comfortable
> handling reflects two things -- first, that you always deliver a product
> they are happy with, and second that you let them cajole you past your
> comfort limit.
> Stand in front of a mirror. Practice saying "No, I can't do that." Or
> even just "No." "No, I'm not comfortable taking that on." "No, I don't
> want to." "No, I'm busy." Role play with your friends. Do all the
> exercises we tell teens to do, to deal with peer pressure -- because
> that's what this is.
> But don't expect other people to keep track of your schedule, or to know
> how overworked you feel, or to realize that you are overcommitting
> yourself -- or care. Lots of people in the SCA make absurd commitments
> of personal time and effort. Some of them thrive on it. Others don't and
> they need to stop doing it.
> Make yourself a sign for your wall. "The SCA is a game. If it's not fun,
> I'm doing it wrong." And when something stops being fun, stop doing it.
> It's not being mean; it's being fair to yourself.
> =Caitlin Cheannlaidir, OL
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