[Southern] Gulf War Pre-registration Reminder

[Brian Martin]

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	Greetings All,

	Today is January 17th, there are exactly two weeks left to
pre-register for Gulf War. If you have not pre-registered, please do so
immediately!

	If you don't pre-register, you can't reserve land! It will cost you
more money! Your pets will hate you and no one at work will talk to you! Its
been scientifically proven that people who pre-register are considered more
attractive by the opposite sex. Those who pre-register for Gulf Wars make,
on average, 73% more annually than those who do not, so pre-register now and
receive a huge raise!* If you pre-register now, the odds of gorgeous super
models or hunky actors showing up at your door step are 99% better than if
you were dead! (Its my rough estimate that models and actors prefer the
company of living SCA members who have pre-registered for Gulf War 2 to 1
over dead people.) You want to meet Brad Pitt and Claudia Schiffer don't
you? Then pre-register for Gulf War!** Best of all, if you pre-register for
the war,
I personally assure you that Bill Gates will send you a check for one
million dollars!!!! *** Finally, if you pre-register for the war, I'll stop
bothering you about it!! This is an offer that you simply can't beat! ****
(Offer void were prohibited, batteries not included, please drink
responsibly.)

	Thank you,
	Pendaran Glamorgan,
	Baron of Bryn Gwlad (the barony hates it when I tell people that but
its true)
	Knight of Ansteorra (at least until the Crown reads this post)
	Lion of Ansteorra (believe it or not)
	Gulf War Liaison (I was the only one who didn't take a step back
when they called for volunteers)



*Warning: Neither the Crown and Kingdom of Ansteorra, the SCA or the people
running Gulf War XI support the lunatic claims made by the over eager
liaison. Please don't believe that you will receive a pay raise by
pre-registering for war. But you should pre-register anyway because it is
the right and decent thing to do. President W wants you to do it, Uncle Sam
wants you to do it, Aaron and Britta want you to do it!

** To the best of my knowledge, Brad Pitt and Claudia Schiffer have never
heard of the SCA or of Gulf War. Further more, my using their names is
merely a cheap attempt to get you to pre-register for the war, and does not
guarantee that you'll ever meet them. Still, it could happen. After all,
people win the lottery all of the time, so amazing things do happen, right?

*** Okay, this one is an out and out lie. Bill Gates will not send you any
money what so ever. Man, I just have no shame.

**** That one is true. If you pre-register for the war, I will stop
harassing you about it.