[Steppes] FW: Chaucer's Pick-Up Lines!
Betsy Marshall
betsy at softwareinnovation.com
Thu May 4 02:08:43 PDT 2006
Too much fun!
-----Original Message-----
From: sca-cooks-bounces+betsy=softwareinnovation.com at ansteorra.org
[mailto:sca-cooks-bounces+betsy=softwareinnovation.com at ansteorra.org] On
Behalf Of Laura C. Minnick
Sent: Wednesday, May 03, 2006 10:39 PM
To: sca-cooks at ansteorra.org
Subject: [Sca-cooks] Chaucer's Pick-Up Lines!
Just in time for 40-Year! Pick-up lines suitable for the Medieval Congress
at Kalamazoo, and far too fun to not import into the SCA! (Change the dorme
roome to a pavilion, and you're in business!)
Found (along with a LOT of other fun stuffe) at:
http://houseoffame.blogspot.com/2006/05/to-kalamazoo-wyth-love.html
>GALFRIDUS CHAUCERES LYNES OF PICKE-VPPE:
>
>-Do sheriffs administere thee to those who breke the kinges peace? Bycause
>thou lookst "fyne."
>
>-Yf thou were a latyn tretise ich wolde putte thee in the vernacular.
>
>-Ich do deuote myn diligence to studye of the anatomie of engendrure. Ich
>haue happed vpon an abstruse passage in the werke of Constantyne the
>Affrikan De Coitu, the which I kan nat construe. For lernynges sake and
>the goode of wisdom, woldstow performe the acte of venus withe me so that
>ich may interpret thys clause in propre wise?
>
>-Ich loved thy papere, but yt wolde looke much better yscattred across the
>floore of myn rentede dorme roome at dawne.
>
>-Art thou a disastrous poll tax? Bycause I feele a risynge comynge on.
>
>-Nyce bootes. Wanna swyve?
>
>-Thou lookst so mvch lyk an aungel that the friares haue lefte the roome
>yn terror!
>
>-Shulle we maken the cindreblokke to synge?
>
>-Woldstow haue me shyfte thyne voweles?
>
>-Were thou yn my seisin, ich wolde nevir escheat on thee.
>
>-Thy beaute ys more intoxicatyng than the OVP openne bar.
>
>-Yf thy beautee were an poeme, yt wolde make Dante looke lyk Marcabru.
>
>-The preeste telleth me that we aren more than VII degrees of
>consanguinitee. Game on!
>
>-Ich notyce that myn demense and thyn do abutte. Wolde yt plese thee to
>consolidate ovre powere-base in the midlands?
>
>-Makstow a pilgrymage heere often?
>
>-Let vs breake oure mornyng faste togedir tomorrowe. Shal ich sende a page
>wyth a message for thee, or shal ich wake thee wyth an aubade composid ex
>tempore?
>
>-Ich coude drynke a yearlye tun of thee.
>
>-Ys thy father a makere of walles? For how else dide he gyve thee svch a
>tall and fayre forheed?
>
>-Ich haue the tale of Lancelot yn myn roome. Woldstow rede of yt wyth me?
>
>--By my soule, thou art a verye mappe of helle. For thy face lyk the
>rivere Styx wil make me swere oothes neuer to be fforsworn, and thy
>embrace lyk the Lethe shal make me foryet al else, and lyk vnto the
>Flegeton thyn arse ys ON FYRE!
>
>-Woldstow be myn Gaveston?
>
>-Howe abovte a blancmange and the acte of Venus? Whatte, blancmange
>pleseth thee nat?
>
>-If ich sayde that thou hadde a bele chose, woldstow holde it ayeinst me?
___________________________________________________________________________
Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something
else is more important than fear. --Ambrose Redmoon
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