Reply re: Your Blue Feather Concerns

Pug Bainter pug at
Tue Dec 3 11:33:11 PST 1996

>>I have been sexually mature for ten years or so.  I dont think I have ever
>>worn a badge/shield/emblem/t-shirt that said: "Im straight and proud!" or
>>even "I support straight people!"  Never felt the need to publish it. With
>>the exception of only a _very_ few- mostly overridden with insecurities,
>>IMHO- I cant think of any straight folks who would ever do any of those
>>things either.  
> Well, the nice thing about being straight is that there aren't too many
> people who are willing to go around beating you up, killing you or taking
> away your civil rights because of your sexual orientation.

I think a very basic thing is missing. Gays/lesbians/bisexuals are still
in the minority. This means they are not the norm and thus may need more
support than those of us who are closer to the norm. (Not to say we're
normal. *grin*) If for not other reason than to know who else has a
similar lifestyle.

Do we not support other minority groups within the SCA? We have groups
dedicated to brewing, clothing making, heavy fighting, light fighting,
different time periods, etc. These are preferences that people have.
Why is sexual orientation or even religious preference to be excluded
from having their own sub groups? Doesn't mean you have to participate
in them.

> Sociologically,
> gay and lesbians are what are termed a subcultue (just as the SCA is itself
> another subculture).

This is very much true.

> I am very glad that you've never had to deal with straight people who are so
> insecure about gay people (or about their own location on the Kinsey Scale)
> that they resort to verbal and/or physical gay bashing.  Or to supporting
> legislation that gnaws away gay civil rights.  Or to sending money to right
> wind preachers who literally advicate on the radio to burn, beat, kill,
> stomp and otherwise eradicate queers.

I grew up in a very small redneck area and can atest that this is true.
I was quite amazed how open things were when I moved to Houston and

> As I mentioned in my post, I don't know that Ansteorra needs or wants a more
> structured guild/household/formal activities.

Need? I really doubt it considering how accepting most of the populace
I know is. Want? It sounds like a good thing to me.

>>Why is this necessary? Nobody teaches straight people about straight people
>>in the Current Middle Ages, do they?

Do straight people know which bars to go to to find people with similar
interestes? Do straight people know where it's openly acceptable for
them to hit on different individuals?

Does any minority know about to act within a new social group without

>>Also, why do I or any other people
>>need to know who's doing what in which bedroom at all?

They have no need. Does that mean gay bashers and rumor mongers don't
make it their business?

> We aren't talking about bedroom activities.  Although the folks (usually my
> close friends) who ask me questions MOST OFTEN ask "What do you guys
> actually 'DO'?" ... prurient interest does exist.

The same things everyone else does, only different. Just like every
other coupling there is.

> Sometimes I get questions
> from folks who think they're bi and want to do some Q & A before they take
> the leap off the precipice and try it themselves.

Well that's silly. *wink* After all, you can always find close friends
that are willing to be closer.

>>You said yourself that gays in the SCA are commonplace nowadays- this has
>>been my experience as well.
> I don't know about "commonplace"...

Well for me not very. I know a lot more gay/lesbian/bisexuals from my
mundane experiences than I do from the SCA. (Probably higher than than
10% guideline in different social groups.) Hell, I doubt I could name
more than 2 in the SCA right now. They are local and I could have cared
less about anyone's orientation.

> Also, mixers give us a chance to show appreciation to our straight friends
> who support us in so many ways.  Many of the Blue Feather Balls have a mixed
> straight-gay attendance.  No one throws a party like an out-there queen.  So
> another purpose is just to have fun.  You really want to turn down an
> opportunity for some really fun parties?


>>Now maybe its just that we straight folks arent as motivated to get our
>>singles together... 

You don't know match makers? You don't know of social groups that throw
their own parties? (Belted circles? Laurel circles? Bardic circles? *grin*)

>>or maybe its that we dont have as much pride about our orientation...

Pride isn't necessarily it. If you are a minority and want everyone to
know it, you need to be able to express it. A lot of people have done
this by saying, "I'm gay and proud." It's more a matter of not being
ashamed, IMO.

>>or maybe its that were just too touchy about our activities in the bedroom...

And gays aren't?! They are the ones who get prosecuted for it and not
the straights. (Well except from extremest gays.)

> Above all, though, Dieter, if the idea disturbs you, Don't Participate.

Isn't that always the easiest way, but lots of people fight change or
diversity. *sigh*

Btw, I'm sorry if I don't make much sense. I'm having sinus problems and
not thinking very straight.


Phelim Uhtred Gervas  | "I want to be called. COTTONTIPS. There is something 
Barony of Bryn Gwlad  |  graceful about that lady. A young woman bursting with 
House Flaming Dog     |  vigor. She blinked at the sudden light. She writes
pug at           |  beautiful poems. When ever shall we meet again?"

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