peer fear

[Baker, Mike]

Burke, I would like to think that we were also helped greatly by association 
with existing members who acted the part of "good peers" / approachable 
peers *even though* they might not have attained the titles thereof. Folk 
who believed in "the Dream", who were willing to teach AND willing to put up 
with / support newcomers.

Certainly, TG John & Willow helped with the process, but in the above I 
think more of our beloved dance instructor and her house, as well as William 
Blackfox & Frederick von Sternwald, years before the latter two were 
elevated (and before the core participants from Silverthorne withdrew to the 
mists of Mundania).

Then, also, there was our great Moonschadeen exuberance and energy which 
should be remembered. I'd wager that we had some of the most shy individuals 
attracted to the Shire that could ever be expected to be drawn into the 
Society. We collectively refused to let them stay on the sidelines, included 
them in every way we could think of (and some that shouldn't have been, 
granted!). Of those I think of in this way, many have chosen paths that no 
longer include the SCA -- but I can think of at most one or two who came 
away from the experience still unable to accept attention, and many who went 
on to careers or other endeavors with social demands I like to think their 
Moonschadowe experience helped them prepare for. Military, martial arts 
instructors, other teachers, business careers with heavy emphasis on 
customer contact: these are only off the top of my memory.

At least in part, I think that our early association with the likes of 
Blackfox & Melissande & Frederick & the rest all helped, and that you and I 
and the rest of the crew passed along the examples we had been given. Passed 
along, and built upon. (Some of us more and farther than others, of course 
<wink&gryn>!)

al-Sayyid Amr ibn Majid al-Bakri al-Amra
     currently residing in Barony of the Steppes, Kingdom of Ansteorra
Mike C. Baker                      mbaker at rapp.com
Any opinions expressed are obviously my own unless explicitly stated 
otherwise!

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At 03:25 PM 12/27/96 -0600, [Britta] wrote:
>MOHO, a lot of this boils down to appropriate timing. One gentle, in the
>attempt to rid himself of the dreaded peer fear, decides to approach the
>first brass hat, no matter what. In doing so he interrupts an important
>conversation and thereby annoys the peer.
>Yes, this is one senario.
>I've also noticed most of these posts deal with the idea that the novice
>gentle must always be the initiator in conversation. Why can't a peer
>approach shy looking gentle with some type of compliment on their garb
>or something. Seems to me that would be the ideal SCA welcome type!
>Britta the Red

I agree that timing has a lot to do with it.  But I think that peer density 
(number of peers in the area not thickness of our skulls :)  ) has just as 
much impact.  When I joined there were very few peers in northern Ansteorra, 
two I think (Duke John and Duchess Willow).  Duke John was also the only 
fighting peer up here, so if you wanted to get any training you went to 
Namron fighter practice and work with him. Usually Duchess Willow was also 
at practice so you were exposed to her and before long the idea of
peer fear was not nearly so strong.
   One other thing that impacted my early days was joining the heralds 
collage.  This exposed me to a number of the southern peers in the informal 
setting of heralds meetings.  This plus helping with court heralding can 
break you of an peer fear very quickly.

In Service to the Dream
Sir Burke Kyriell MacDonald



mka. Burke McCrory
burkemc at ionet.net