ANST - Old Timers' fighting...
CRICKETRED at aol.com
Fri Aug 1 07:28:03 PDT 1997
In a message dated 97-08-01 06:38:22 EDT, you write:
On Thu, 31 Jul 1997 21:47:51 +0200, Thorgrim wrote:
>Speaking of old-timers fighting, maybe the Kingdom could come up with an
>entire band of aged fighters, have them practice together, and then
>appear at wars together. Yeah! This is a great idea!! Call it
>(ta-daaahhh!) the WALKER BRIGADE!!!
>Hee hee hee hee hee (etc etc etc)
Before you laugh too hard Thorgrim, remember the song "The Crippled
For those who don't.. here are the Lyrics.. I have it on tape.. it sounds
great.. I played it for Kief once...
THE CRIPPLE'S SHIELD-WALL
By Leslie Fish
Consider the plight of the one-legged knight
As he braces his crutch with his shield
He'll stand still and wait 'til you come for the bait
Then you'll find that the bastard won't yield!
Do you knock his one leg down, there's still no relief
He'll crawl down the field with his sword in his teeth
And the reach of his sword-arm defies all belief
When he fights in the Cripple's Shield-Wall!
Beware the old dame who's arthritic and lame
So knee-sprung she barely can stand
For her hands and her eye are still steady and spry
She's the best crossbow shot in the land!
With a repeating crossbow and war-arrow blade
She can pierce any armor that's ever been made
Be glad she's not drawn to the highwayman's trade!
She just fights in the Cripple's Shield-Wall!
No profit you'll find from the knight who is blind
He can hear you twelve paces away
He'll listen off-hand 'til he's sure where you stand
Then his bill-hook reaps far more then hay!
He can fight in the forest, the river, the plain
With his hearing unhampered by dark, fog or rain
He must know his ground, but he'll sure bring you pain
As he fights in the Cripple's Shield-Wall!
Pray do not go near the knight who can't hear
Though he can't tell command-calls at all
He reads signs from his friends, and his post he defends
With a lightning fast seven foot maul!
They say when it's whirling, it raises a breeze
And the head on its' chain has been known to break trees
So when he starts swinging, the prudent man flees
Where he fights in the Cripple's Shield-Wall!
Watch out in the fight for the cripple-armed knight
Whose hand can't swing up --- only down
For he'll watch thru the dance 'til he spies a good chance
Then his downstroke will cost you your crown!
His shield-arm will raise up his sword-arm and then
He'll watch for his chance with his downstroke again
You know that he'll strike -- but you never know when
And he fights in the Cripple's Shield-Wall!
Beware, I implore, all you masters of war
Who prefer to draft healthy young boys
For the blind and the lame can be good at this game
When well-placed, defending the toys
They've learned their art well, and they strike hard and true
If they've something to prove, then they'll prove it on you!
The last line on Earth that you'd want to drive thru
You can swear is the Cripple's Shield-Wall!
Beware of the Cripple's Shield-Wall!
copyright 1991 Leslie Fish
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