ANST - (Fwd) Filk: The Day the Table Died

j'lynn yeates jyeates at
Tue Jul 21 12:40:00 PDT 1998

the Tree-Weasel Relay Network (TWRN) proudly presents for your 
enjoyment, passed along from Sir Balthazar to myself, and onward to all 
my aetheric friends and enemies  ...


The Day the Table Died
(To the tune of "American Pie" by Don McLean)

Hugh the Barefoot, Barony of the South Downs, Meridies

'Twas so long ago but I still remember,
How the legends used to make me smile.
And I knew if given half a chance,
I'd kill so many with my lance.
And maybe I'd be famous for awhile.
so death and bloodshed I'll deliver,
With every arrow from my quiver,
All this bloody hassle....
Just to Defend one castle...
I remember how he shed a tear
When he learned of Lance and Guinevere
And something touched me way down here
The Day the Table Died.


Hail, hail to the fellas in mail
Slaying dragons, saving damsels, chasing after the Grail
We fought off evil till our faces were pale
Wondering if there was a chance we might fail.....
Could there be a chance we might fail?

Hast though read the book of Merlin
With its stories that Sir Rod of Sterling
Could have penned for Twilight Zone?
Dost thou believe in legend'ry
And the tales of Chivalry
Like the one about the sword pulled from the stone?
Well Lancelot came from Paree
To serve in Arthur's cavalry
He sweated off his tail, 
to wear the royal mail.
When Lance had won his confidence 
He met Queen Guinevere by chance
And melted down his iron pants
The day the table died.


For several years Lance and the Queen
Had kept their meetings clandestine
Finding ways to be alone
'Twas on a fateful summers day
When Mordred found them in the hay
And the Frenchman knew that his cover had been blown.
Arthur cried swear by Excalibur
That you truly did not lie with her!
The notion was absurd
Lance said not a word.
And so the knight no longer chaste
Unto his native soil he raced.
Left Guenivere alone to face
The day the table died.


Convicted of a grave offense
By Mordred's damning evidence
Guinevere was set to burn
Arthur loathed his bastard son
For all his work had been undone
But he vowed that the tables would be turned.
So when Lance arrive to save the day
And carried Guinevere away
The king was so relieved
His true love was reprieved!
Then Guinevere became a nun
And Lancelot had no more fun
And Mordred soon was on the run,
The day the table died.



I stand guard at the castle door
Though Arthur reigns not any more
Camelot's a memory
It does my heart good to recall
The mighty kingdom's rise and fall
And the space it occupies in history.
The spirit of those days it seems
Continues only in our dreams
But there we can enjoy it
Let no one dare destroy it!
One prophecy of the days of yore
Says Arthur shall arise one more
Oh, make it all as it was before,
The day the table died.

Chorus Twice

... When we hunt, we all function with one mind
... - Boingo, Pedestrian Wolves
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