ANST - Question...

[Sandy M Koenig]

 in this case the person stated he was TRYING to make me angry.   I don'
need that kind of stress.  Does anybody.  I certainly don't go out of my
way to p-- someone off, and I don't appreciate it being done to me.
requesting something is much less abrasive than demanding and there are
less harsh words that can be used

raven


On Mon, 29 Jun 1998 08:21:55 -0500 "Fox Anton Purtill"
<fpurtill at simpletel.com> writes:
>Tempers are an interesting beast Pug.  Once you find one it tends to 
>have
>the effect of duplicating itself in someone else and then they 
>immediately
>attack each other.
>
>I often say things incorrectly, and I know what I meant and wanted to 
>get
>across but it just didn't come out that way to the person I was saying 
>it
>to.  It's not that I said anything wrong from my point of view, but 
>from
>theirs.  This inflames the temper on their side and gets both upset.
>
>In this sense above, I did no wrong per se, but it still ended up in 
>anger.
>
>Who is to correct?  Myself for not being able to interpret how my 
>words will
>affect the person I'm speaking to? Or the person getting mad at me for 
>not
>understanding what I was trying to say?
>
>Some people are predisposed to taking things badly from another (as 
>your own
>wife and I have discovered, and have worked around over time) without 
>real
>intent to do so.
>
>It has been said that Catriona (Mary) is caustic or abraisive, but I 
>think
>she speaks more clearly her own thoughts than many, and because it is 
>from
>her heart it is often very strong.  But just because people feel it 
>more
>that take offense at it, but she is she wrong?  No.
>
>It is more a matter of perception, how one sees what another will say. 
> You
>can only judge properly your own mind and feelings on any given topic 
>and
>keep council with your own ears or those that can help you understand 
>what
>you have heard.
>
>If one must seek to fix or currect someone, calmly take it up with 
>them
>first,
>if they refuse to see the wrong and you feel there still needs a 
>lesson of
>some sort, take it to someone close to them and see if they can grasp 
>the
>problem.  Failing that the best to do is leave it be, because you have
>tried.
>
>I point out this is my opinion only, without a cup of coffee or soda.
>
>Fox Anton Purtill - Karin Höijer-Purtill
>blackfox at flash.net     khoijer at flash.net
>House Starblade - www.flash.net/~blackfox
>   (H) 512-821-3205 - (W) 512-425-9732
>
>>   When one person does something wrong, they are unchivalric and 
>need to
>>   be taken to task for it. Right?
>>
>>   People then decide that they are the judge and jury and must bring
>>   this public as rudely as possible to teach the person a lesson, 
>and
>>   thus being unchivalric themself. Right?
>
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