[Ansteorra] What has happened?

[Bethany Burke]

I must clarify what I posted earlier.  I recently attended an event that upon pulling up several men unloaded everything and set up the tent and even offered to help set up the inside as well.  At this event I did not carry one item for myself as many people offered to take it from me.  But this event (Amlac's Lady of the Lake) was an exception.  The last Gulf War I attended I was pulling an ice chest and carrying 2 drums and a chair.  Many men passed by me with greetings but no offer of help  and were headed in the same direction.  This was not what surprised me, what surprised me were the color of the belts of the men who passed by, red and white.  My hopes are that these gentles are not from our Kingdom as I did not know them.  

There are certain individuals that are always of help to me and others, Fox, Gavin, Dirk, Ian, Oakie, Aflac, just to name a few, but I do attend events that these people are either busy or are not in attendance.  I have a few times said to someone offering to put up my tent for me, "yes I would love some help but I need to do more than just direct so that I know how to put it up in the future".  Most of the time though I allow anyone to do most things for me.  I also have not encountered a situation that I asked for help and did not get it.
 
I have heard stories from a certain Baroness that once she had made two trips while unloading her car, passing by the same group of men, on her third trip back she was bombarded with help.  What happened, she put her brass hat on before heading back from the third trip.
 
I don't expect a fighter to call hold and jump off the field in full armor to help me with my stuff, I don't even expect someone to run across the site when they see me carrying something either.  And if a man is already carrying stuff I do not expect him to take on my burden as well.  What I expect is, if you are standing around and you notice a lady carrying more than just a basket or chair, offer assistance.  If you see someone over burdened regardless of their gender, offer assistance, regardless of your gender as well.  And please if you are heading in the same direction as a lady who is carrying more than she should(ie a basket or a chair), offer assistance.
 
As far as a woman refusing to be helped, they are also the exception not the rule.  If you are one of these independent woman, please thank them kindly but tell them you do want to do it yourself.  And when you encounter this politely excuse yourself.  This should allow those of us who want to be waited on and treated delicately to continue to be, and those few stubbornly independent woman to keep their Independence with out the need for rudeness.
Elizabeth



		
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