[Ansteorra] What are we here for?

[Lisa]

Well, I have to spread word fame for a young man I don't even know and let
everyone know that "chivalry" isn't dead, even in mundane life. :)
Yesterday I was in WalMart and was manhandling a 50lb bag of dog food into
our cart. (For size comparison here, I'm 5'4"  and weigh approximately
100-105.)  I've done this many times before and grew up on a farm carrying
bags of cattle feed of the same size so it wasn't that big of an issue for
me.  A young man just entering that aisle saw me trying to get a good grip
so I could lift it into the cart and RAN the length of the aisle to offer
his assistance.  Even though I knew I could do it, I graciously allowed him
to take the bag and put it in the cart for me and then thanked him with a
smile for his lady as well.  He gives me hope for our young men, as he was
by guestimation, in his late teens or at most early 20's.  It made me feel
good to see that there are still young men out there still willing to offer
assistance.

Elizabeta

----- Original Message -----
From: "Chris Zakes" <dontivar at gmail.com>
To: "Kingdom of Ansteorra - SCA, Inc." <ansteorra at lists.ansteorra.org>
Sent: Wednesday, October 04, 2006 6:42 AM
Subject: Re: [Ansteorra] What are we here for?


> At 10:45 PM 10/3/2006, you wrote:
> >I don't post to the list often, but this is an issue that has concerned
me
> >for some
> >time.
> >
> >I am one of those ladies that refuse help as often as I accept it. I am
just
> >very independent and there are many reasons why I may or may not let
someone
> >carry things for me at that time. I remember in the late 90s when the
> >subject came up that some ladies were being aggressive and rude when guys
> >asked to help them. I have seen a rapid decline in courtesy since then.
(In
> >a few cases maybe it was deserved, I do not know and will not argue that
> >issue) When I do decline help, I try to decline as gracefully as I can
and
> >tell the other person that I do appreciate them asking. Even when I do
> >decline help I enjoy seeing people offer to help one another.
>
>
> Precisely. The scenario *should* run something like this:
>
> Person A: (Observing person B carrying things) "Would you like a hand
> with that?"
>
> Person B: (pick one) "No, I've got it, but thank you anyway." OR
> "Sure, if you'd take this, this, and that, I can handle the rest."
>
> A polite offer to help, a polite acceptance or refusal, no hurt
> feelings in either direction.
>
>          -Tivar Moondragon
>
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