[Ansteorra] Courtesy challenge

[Sir Lyonel Oliver Grace]

Salut cozyns,

In response to Diarmaid's comment:

> >I don't mean that in any sort of insulting way. I'm just noting that what 
>we
> >think of chivalric courtesy and proper behavior isn't doesn't go back 
>much
> >before the Victorian era, and wasn't much more than an ideal at that.

Don Tivar asks:

>And where does that tie in with the whole "courtly love" thing?

Andreas Capellanus (and many writers thereafter, at least up to Charles 
d'Orleans at the start of the Fifteenth Century) describes how a gentleman 
should act, look, and react in the presence and absence of the lady who is 
the object of his desire. This behavior includes all manner of ague-like 
symptoms that are not expected to preclude the gentleman's desire to behave 
in a courtly fashion. The real point of contention here is what constitutes 
"courtly" behaviour, which the French called "courtoisie" (the root word for 
the English "courtesy").

In support of Diarmaid's statements, I know of no courtly literature that 
suggests a gentleman do manual labor in place of his lady. Generally, to be 
worthy of affection, the lady is presumed to be of a high station. To put it 
bluntly, she's supposed to be wealthy. She's supposed to have servants. If 
she's carrying boxes, she's fallen on hard times. Read Lanval for a similar 
circumstance (although in that case it's the knight who has fallen on hard 
times) to see how everyone reacts to poverty. It's viewed as a personal 
failing. Not having enough money to dress well and have adequate servants 
was viewed as shameful behavior--like walking around without a shirt on. The 
polite thing to do in the Middle Ages would be to look away and pretend you 
didn't notice.

Now, please understand, I am not validating such behavior. This is one of 
those disconnects between now and then that we can't fully embrace in the 
SCA. We'd all have to have enough money to afford to hire servants and bring 
them to events. Instead, I think we're better off taking the more modern 
view of courtesy and offering to carry things.

lo vostre per vos servir
Meser Lyonel Oliver Grace
_________________________________
Micel yfel deth se unwritere.
		--AElfric of York