[Ansteorra] Telling someone that what they are doing is not period

[Judie Willey]

Thank you Lady Nuala for your wonderful and also humorous insight.

Rebbe Hadassah


On 9/16/06, lizdenpeters at juno.com <lizdenpeters at juno.com> wrote:
>
> Good Gentles,
>
> This is a subject close to my heart as I was "blasted" numerous times as
> a newbie for my apparel.  In the Knowne World Handbook, it advises " Be
> gentle to the stranger.  If it is necessary to offer advice or correction
> (as when someone in modern dress wanders onto the field), speak in a
> friendly manner, informing rather than reproving him and doing everything
> necessary possible to help him find proper attire."  I was told in the
> beginning that as long as I made an honest attempt to look "period" even
> if it was inept (and trust me, it was), that I would not be chastised.
> That proved to be untrue.  And, at my second event, I was roundly blasted
> at least eight (yes, eight!!) times for my attire.  It made me very angry
> as I had been working a lot of overtime at work and staying up very late
> to finish clothing for my husband and myself.  The ninth time it
> happened, I just smiled as sweetly as I could (seething inside, of
> course!) and said that since I obviously had no idea of what materials to
> use or what to make that perhaps the lady could make me something
> appropriate to wear and I would thenceforth wear what she made me with
> pride.  The woman was speechless.  During the course of my second event,
> I was compelled to repeat that another time.  And I did the same thing at
> every future event I attended when my garb was criticized (and it was)
> and probably still is.  (I am just not confronted as much as I used to
> be.)
>
> The SCA is an expensive avocation even when you do your best to economize
> on things.  I wear cotton garb (I have been told many times that cotton
> is not a period material.) and will continue to do so.  It is very
> comfortable in the Ansteorran summers and a very practical material as
> well as relatively inexpensive. (Will you wear several layers of felted
> wool in 100 degree plus weather??) I hope to make something of linen when
> I can find a color I like at a price I can afford (Don't hold your breath
> on this one!).  I try to approximate a "period look" since that is the
> best I can do.  When I can afford a $3K Panther Pavilion with all the
> various accoutrements to go with it as well as hire people to set it all
> up and take it down and pack it all for me, I will do that (Again, don't
> hold your breath on this one, either.)  Until then, I will use a nylon
> tent because it's what I can afford.  Starting out in the SCA is an
> expensive and time consuming proposition.  It requires a real commitment
> from the newcomer as well as the welcoming group.  You are talking about
> a dedicated wardrobe with accessories, camping equipment, feast gear, and
> many other miscellaneous sundries.  Mentoring and spending that precious
> quantity, TIME, to help a new person is essential.  Getting to know them,
> just a bit, will make any constructive criticism better received.
> Unrealistic expectations from either the group or the newcomer only lead
> to bad feelings on both sides.  An excellent and under used tool to help
> new people is the Known World Handbook.  I wish I had known about it and
> been able to obtain a copy much earlier in my tenure in the SCA.  It
> explains so much -- I refer to it for many things even now.
>
> We all forget stuff even when we have a pretty complete SCA "kit"  -- I
> always seem to forget to bring a mug these days. Today I attended an
> event and forgot my mug but remembered to bring some fabric to "cover the
> mundanity" -- go figure.  Some days I forget feast gear.  Other days,
> other stuff.  Certain mundanities will "creep in" for various reasons,
> even if you have been doing this for a while.  For myself, I try to
> overlook as much of this as I can (ignore the Coke can, the modern chair,
> etc.) and try to focus on the costume, ambiance, heraldry, etc. that make
> the SCA so special.  To do this is the minimum that chivalry and honor
> demand.  Forgive others who are not as attentive to some of these details
> and you will find that they will want to emulate you with your attention
> to these very details.  Lead by example.  Share information gladly.  This
> way we all win.
>
> Your in service,
>
> Lady Fionnghuala the Fair "Nuala" and/or my evil twin, Cedric
> "Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than going to a
> garage makes you a car."
>                              Laurence J. Peter
>
>
> ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> Message: 3  Date: Sat, 16 Sep 2006 11:55:21 -0700 (PDT) From: Donna
> Nesbit <themaefare at yahoo.com>
> Subject: Re: [Ansteorra] Telling someone that what they are doing is not
> period
> To: "Kingdom of Ansteorra - SCA, Inc."
> Greetings, Thank you Duchess Willow for bringing up this topic.  I have
> seen several newcomers in recent times be put off because someone
> questioned their garb. I am in a group that is trying to bring in
> newcomers and restart a group.  We are trying to be very cognizant of our
> demeanor and all of the comments thus far have helped. One thing many
> people must understand is that some of what is period just would not work
> today.  Recently, I saw a book on the history of undergarments.  In times
> it was quite acceptable to reveal parts of the body that we would get in
> trouble for revealing
> today.  Also, some silhouettes that were considered beautiful in the past
> are not appealing today.  We must remember that we are looking at past
> dressing through modern day eyes.  Lady Penelope Miriam Darling
> (SNIP!) "willowjonbardc at juno.com" wrote: Greetings everyone I have a
> special request of you. How can we tell people that what they are doing
> is not correct? That it is not period, but at the same time not make them
> feel bad. (SNIP!) Now as a citizen of the SCA I feel it is my duty to
> inform people that their work may be better if they would stay in period.
> (SNIP!). We need to tell people the rules of the game, but we need to do
> it in a nice way. Does anyone remember a time when someone set you on the
> right path and did in a way that made you feel good? I would like to hear
> about their techniques. Courtesy is one of the pillars of the magic that
> is Ansteorra. We are smart people. We need to figure out how to tell
> people things without hurting their feelings. Duchess Willow de Wisp
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-- 
Rebbe Hadassah Sarai bas Yossi
MoC Barony of Steppes